You’re-Tearing-Me-Apart Pork BBQ
- 2 lb pork tenderloin ($8)
- 1 16 oz bottle of Sweet Baby Ray’s BBQ ($2.50)
- Kaiser rolls ($2)
- 1 white onion, chopped (<$1)
- Place the tenderloin and onions into a slow cooker. What?! You don’t own a slow cooker? Pop some tags at a thrift shop and pick up at least a six-quart Crock Pot. They are magic.
- Pour sauce over the tenderloin. Turn tenderloin over with a fork to make sure it is coated. Set on Low for 8 hours or High for 4-5 hours.
- Go about your life.
- Use two forks to tear it apart. Pretend you’re twirling spaghetti, but use some force.
- Scoop out onto buns; serve. The greatest thing about this recipe is it’s flavorful, impressive to people who don’t know how easy it is, and can make about 8 sandwiches. It also microwaves well without losing much flavor.
- Seasoning Suggestions: Garlic powder, paprika, cumin, oregano, Creole Seasoning
The Breakfast Club Casserole
- 1 dozen eggs, beaten ($1.50
- 6 slices of Texas Toast-style bread (a loaf runs about $2)
- 1 lb of ground sausage OR 1 lb of bacon, diced (sausage is $3, bacon is $5)
- 1 green pepper, diced (<$1)
- 1 purple onion, diced (<$1)
- 2 cups of shredded cheese (your choice what kind, $3)
- Lay bread in a single layer on a 9×13 inch casserole pan (again, hit up Goodwill)
- Brown sausage in a frying pan OR cook bacon until crisp
- Mix together eggs, pepper, onion, sausage/bacon, and half the cheese
- Pour over bread
- Cover in the rest of the cheese
- Put in fridge before you go out drinking
- Wake up, take two aspirin, and bake casserole at 350° F for one hour. Impress hungover friends as they look for their clothing.
- Seasoning Suggestions: Garlic powder, black pepper, oregano, kosher salt
Totally Baked Ziti
- 1lb of whole grain ziti ($1.50)
- 1lb of ground chicken ($4)
- 1/2 lb bacon, diced ($2.50)
- 3 cups of shredded mozzarella ($3)
- 2 cups Ricotta cheese ($3)
- 1 jar of tomato sauce ($2, but I highly recommend Newman’s Own Sockarooni Sauce for $3)
- Bring a pot of water to boil. Add ziti, return to boil. Lower heat and cover for ten minutes or until floppy and tender. Strain.
- Fry bacon until crisp. Remove bacon and use the same pan (without draining) to brown chicken. Mix bacon into chicken
- Pour tomato sauce directly onto pasta. Mix chicken and bacon with sauce and pasta.
- Layer in 9×13 inch casserole dish. Place half the pasta and meat down, cover with 1 cup of Ricotta cheese, then cover with rest of pasta and top it off with the rest of Ricotta cheese.
- Bake at 350° F for 30 minutes.
- Suggested Seasonings: Oregano, parsley, sage, thyme, rosemary (these all come together usually labeled as “Italian Seasonings”)
Yes, I’m Telling You To Bake Ham And Potatoes In Milk
- 4 Russet potatoes ($2)
- 2 lb of Ham Steak ($6)
- 3 cups of milk (Go buy some damn milk)
- Wash the potatoes. Slice them and lay them in rows on the bottom of your casserole dish.
- Slice the ham into serving sizes (think the size of your hand). Spread either mustard, maple syrup, or honey across the ham slices. Lay them over the potatoes.
- Pour the milk over the whole mess.
- Bake 350° F
- Trust me, it’s amazing. The potatoes get all creamy and soft, the ham turns out very sweet. You can layer onions and peas between the ham and potatoes for some quick veggie fix.
The $10 Chili
- 1 can of kidney beans ($1)
- 1 can of black beans ($1)
- 1 can of Cannellini beans ($1)
- 1 can of diced tomatoes and chiles ($1)
- 1 can of tomato sauce ($1)
- 1 can of Fiesta Corn (also called Mexicorn, $1)
- 1 lb of ground turkey ($4)
- Open the cans. Drain the beans and corn, but not the tomatoes. (Protip: Open the can wear the lid is still attached by just one piece. Hold the lid down and tip the can over the sink. Water falls out; food stays in)
- Pour all of the canned contents into the Crock Pot.
- Brown your turkey. Add it to the pot.
- Set on Low for 8 hours or High for at least 4 hours (you can also do this with just a regular pot on the stove if you let simmer for at least one hour).
- Enjoy the benefits of a high fiber diet. This can feed you and a roommate for a weekend. Stir in sour cream or cheddar if you want. If you really hate yourself, you can make a Frito Pie by pouring the chili over a bowl of Frito corn chips.
- Seasoning Suggestions: Paprika, cumin, Adobo, black pepper, chili powder