1. The first thing that comes to your mind in the morning is breakfast. You really don’t understand how people can lounge around in bed all morning on the weekend because when you wake up you’re starving. The first thing your mind thinks about is how much you can’t wait for breakfast.
2. There is no such thing as too much breakfast. You’re basically Ron Swanson, when you say you want all the eggs and bacon you actually mean you want all the eggs and bacon, not just a little bit.
3. It might be 9 AM but you’re already thinking about lunch. It doesn’t matter what time of day it is, once you finish one meal you’re already thinking about the next.
4. When you eat a whole meal but 30 minutes later you’re hungry again. Everyone else just looks at you like you’re crazy and they’ll say things like, “but we literally just ate.” You just want to reply, “yeah I know, but I’m hungry again, back off.”
5. Hangry is a real thing. People better watch out when you’re so hungry you get angry because it is a real thing and they will feel the wrath of your hangry state. Being hangry is like talking to people who are addicted to coffee before they’ve had their morning cup, it’s just not a good idea.
6. Turning down food isn’t a thing in your book. If someone offers you food you take it. You don’t try to be polite and say “no thank you” when you really want to scarf it down. You take the food, say thank you and enjoy every little bit of it.
7. You never get full. Everyone around you might eat less than you, but you’re somehow still always hungry when all your friends claim they are full. Full isn’t a feeling you’re used too, no matter how much you eat there is always room for more.
8. You’ve never understood being “too full for dessert,” like HOW?! You just don’t understand how someone could possibly be too full for ice cream, like there is ALWAYS room for ice cream.
9. When people tell you you’re a bottomless pit you simply reply, “thanks, I know” because it’s true.
10. People like going to the mall for shopping, but you for food. You need to go get your fix of soft pretzels with cheese, frozen yogurt, chocolate and of course, lunch.
11. You always have snacks on you. You carry snacks in your purse because you never know when you’ll start feeling hungry so preparation is key. Some people carry phone chargers, you carry food.
12. Going to the grocery store is your favorite kind of shopping. Walking down the isles is almost like walking down the stairs when you were a kid on Christmas morning. There really is no better feeling than all your favorite foods at the tips of your fingers, especially when there is sales.
13. Food porn is your favorite thing to look up on Instagram. How could you not love looking at all those pictures of perfectly baked macaroni and cheese or bagels with perfect toppings? So much goodness in one picture.
14. You would rather spend your money on food than on anything else. Your friends would rather have that designer purse, but you’d rather order an appetizer with your meal so you’ll easily pass up the purse.
15. When people ask you if you’re hungry your response is always something along the lines of, “yeah, I could eat.” Even if you just had lunch because the only thing better than one lunch is two.
16. You open the fridge about 50 times a day. Even when there is no food in it you continue to open it, hoping that better food will magically appear or until you get to the point you can’t wait any longer and settle for whatever you can find in there.
17. You dread it when someone asks for a bite of your food. It actually pains you to let them have some because you only got five mozzarella sticks with your appetizer and if they have one that leaves you with four. Yeah, it matters to us.
18. You don’t worry about calories. Maybe you should be a little more conscious, but food just tastes so good it’s the least of your worries. You’d rather be happy with a little belly than skinny and hangry all the time.
19. You get more excited over a good meal than nearly anything else. If someone tells you that they want to go to your favorite restaurant it’s like telling you that you just won the lottery. You can’t control your excitement.
20. Free samples in grocery stores are like golden tickets. There is nothing better than some food while you grocery shop to help fill your cart with more unnecessary food you love.
21. You always plan your next meal as your making your first one. You think of all the options you have to eat in a given day. You think if you want to go out to lunch of bring your lunch to work. And hell, there are days where you’ll do both because there is no such thing as too much food.
22. Only eating three times a day isn’t a thing to you. You have to have food constantly throughout the day in order to be your best self and be productive.
23. You have to brush your teeth to stop yourself from eating. This is the only thing that might save you from late night snacking. It’s a bribe you have to make with yourself to try to show some self-control.
24. When people ask you to go on diets with them you look at them like they have three heads. Like do they know who you are? There is no way you could only eat a limited amount of times a day. Those foods would never fill you up.
25. You count the hours until your next meal basically because you’re a savage and food is the only thing that brings you true joy in the world.