These Are All The Ways You Killed Me

Rachel Baran
Rachel Baran

The first time you
killed me
was our five months,
I asked to go hang out with my friends
and you made me cry
for asking.

The second time you
killed me
was when you took my phone
to look through it
because you didn’t trust me,
yet there was
nothing to find.

The third time you
killed me
was when we were in my
driveway,
you looked at me
and said if you backed out
you’d never pull back in.

The third time really killed me,
but not as much as the fourth.

The fourth time you
killed me
was about five days later,
I heard you found someone
new.
A stranger
you met over the weekend.
You ran to her
to take away your pain.

I couldn’t eat,
I couldn’t sleep
I couldn’t stop crying,
and you had her.

The fifth time you
killed me
was after you and her
broke up.
You killed me when
you said you should have tried to
fix things with me
instead of running off
into the arms of a stranger.

The sixth time you
killed me
was when we started hanging out again
and you promised
we’d go ice fishing in the
morning.
I woke up early
and waited
and waited,
but you never called.

The sixth time
was the last time
I allowed you to control me
because after the sixth time
I realized I had
enough.

You weren’t allowed
to kill me anymore. TC mark

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