1. You start to deny it.
No, I’m not fat. I only drank diet soda every day for the two weeks.
2. You ask your friends if what you’re wearing makes you look fat.
I should have worn a v-neck today.
3. You begin to remember how much fast food you ate.
Well, those large fries went to my thighs. Thank you very much, McDonalds.
4. You also start cursing chocolates.
Kitkat, you piece of shit!
5. You shake your arms and it jiggles.
Extra jelly, anybody?
6. You blame your parents for raising you with good food.
Thanks Mom, for raising me in the supermarket. I will forever regret the amount of cheerios I ate when I was five.
7. You go to the weighing scale and secretly wish you didn’t gain.
Write a “you’re sexy” note on my weighing scale
8. You start researching on the fastest way to lose weight.
Drink air, check. Starve myself to death, check.
9. You realize that the only way to lose weight is for you to exercise and eat healthy.
What? You mean Jillian Michaels and Veggies? Na-uh
10. You finally just accept the fact that you’re fat.
“I love food. Fuck it.”