I will no longer be made to feel guilty for making my mental health a priority.
I will no longer be made to feel awful for taking a step back from what brings toxicity into my life.
I will no longer lose myself in the attempts to please others.
I will now take back control of my life and create boundaries to protect my own sanity and spiritual health.
Too often have I hushed my opinions and buried my feelings in the attempts to stabilize the chaos created by those who see nothing beyond their narcissism and manipulation. And the reality is that I am not the only one who has done this. I have seen several people prioritize others over their own needs and desires in the hopes to eliminate conflict and create a place of serenity.
The fatal error in doing so is that when you neglect yourself for the happiness of others, you are involuntarily choosing to change your perception of what you believe is ideal for you as you start to desperately look for ways to be happy in doing what pleases others, even when it goes strictly against what you want simply to maintain equilibrium.
Convincing yourself to put others first, whether it is your friends, family, spouse, in-laws or anyone for that matter, then you are forgetting that beyond all these relations, you are an individual human being and it is impossible for you to keep everyone happy. Thus, when it comes to setting boundaries, we often hesitate because many times, these boundaries unfortunately need to be created between us and a close one. However, you must not forget that setting boundaries does not equal severing ties. Absolutely not. Boundaries simply represent having a safe zone, if you will, between two people where perhaps having an active involvement in each other’s life has not paid well, hence to maintain tranquillity and respect between both, sometimes these boundaries are crucial.
Never feel guilty about creating boundaries, for in the end, it is better to keep a slight distance from someone rather than completely cutting them off, because if you start feeling guilty, then over time you will find it even more difficult to stand up for yourself and will therefore struggle to prevent yourself from molding into what people want you to be rather than what you want for yourself.
Remember, creating boundaries and maintaining relationships can coexist, you just have to know when to give a helping hand and when to draw the line and say no.
No matter how long you have spent losing yourself in the midst of helping others, it is now time to put yourself first, for you have the power to reinvent yourself and the potential to reach the heights you have dreamt of.