The free spirit, the sense of style, the mature immaturity you handled yourself with. The constant drive to become something better than what you were raised to be. You were always so inspiring, but lately you’ve been settling. For someone who was always so determined to be better than those that raised her, it frustrates me to see you sink to their level.
You’re with someone who doesn’t see your worth, who never takes you out. Who won’t even grab a bite with you and your best friend to meet her for the first time because that might be important to you.
A person like you deserves to be shown off to the world because anyone is more than lucky to have you. He doesn’t let you be yourself. You’re staying with him in a crummy apartment where nothing is allowed to be yours. You could pack up in two seconds because nothing there belongs to you.
You’re in his territory. He’s holding you hostage in this rut when you were meant to break through and show the world your potential. We’re in our early twenties and you rarely want to go out. We’ll go to an early dinner occasionally, but then you need to be home because he’ll be home by eleven. We go shopping and all you buy are pajamas and loungewear because he doesn’t take you out like a man should.
What are you settling for? Your 30 year old boyfriend plays his video games while you sit at home drinking a bottle of wine because that’s what your mother does. Don’t you want to break the cycle? There comes a point when you need to ask yourself, is this going to be me? Living in that crummy apartment because he refuses to make a change.
Are you even you anymore, or are you what he has made for himself? A slave who will do the chores he’s laid out in the morning. A prize for only him to see because you never leave that box. All this time you’ve been convincing yourself it’s okay, but every week I get a phonecall about how “stuck” you feel. You were destined for greatness.
You’ve always wanted to get out of this area and do exceptional things. You had goals, but you’ve pushed it all aside & still make long term plans with him. I guess you can only help the willing.