19 Candid Things Newly Single Girls Have Said
By Ashley Twigg
Sure breakups can be tough, but in seeing many of my friends move into the New Year as single girls, here are some less than depressing, candid post breakup thoughts I have been witnessing.
- “I really wish he bought me that automatic car starter he was going to, it’s cold out.”
- “I should have just had sex with him one more time to tide me over for a while.”
- “I wonder if I would cry if I had sex with him now?”
- “I wonder if he would cry if I had sex with him now?”
- “Thank God I know his Netflix password though.”
- “But really though at this point what could it hurt to have sex one more time?”
- “Fuck but he still has my Blueray player, I need that to watch Netflix.”
- “It just pisses me off that half my shit is still at his house…Can he just mail it here?”
- “Just punch me in the face if I get drunk and try to text him, okay?”
- “So which of the guys that I’ve hooked up with can I hook up with again? I can’t let my number go up right now.”
- “But at least I don’t have to listen to fantasy football shit anymore.”
- “This couldn’t have happened before the holidays. I did a lot of fake smiling with his family, that shit is exhausting.”
- “I want to dress like a slut tonight. I need to celebrate being single.”
- “It’s crazy to hook up with someone who doesn’t have man boobs, I have been with him so long I forgot that was even an option.”
- “Now he just keeps texting me to tell me I look good in pictures on Facebook. Like what do I say? I know I do…thanks?”
- “Also, what is with the 3AM “Hey” text? Stop that. That’s not helping anyone.”
- “So who from High School isn’t married with a baby? Probably slim pickings now right?”
- “You know, part of me did actually think he was gay anyway.”
- “I miss his dog a lot more than I miss him. Is that bad?”