woman in red tube dress sitting on brown sand during daytime

I Am Slowly Learning To Love Every Part Of Who I Am

I’m just as guilty as every other woman in the world. We’re constantly comparing ourselves to others in every way possible. To someone’s hair, their lips, their eyebrows, their breasts, the cute shoes they’re wearing, to the way they talk, walk, laugh, sneeze, etc. We live in a world where society is constantly putting out images of women that are unrealistic. I’m guilty of body-shaming myself in every way possible. I’m guilty of not loving myself or the skin I’m in on the daily. I’m guilty of not always loving me and who I am.

Step 1: Stop body shaming.

We live in a world that primarily promotes one size and one size only. However, as women, we should know that beauty comes in all shapes, sizes, and color. What one woman hates about her body, another woman would gladly take. I constantly body shame myself. It’s not something I’m proud of, but it is something I do. I can walk into a room with the loudest laugh, the biggest eyelashes, and the tightest jeans and no one around me would know that it took me hours to get ready. No one would know that I’m constantly wondering if I need to go to the bathroom and brush my lashes. No one would know that I changed my shirt four times because my boobs barely fit into “normal” going out shirts.

I’ve learned that every woman has something about their body that they would gladly change, and I’m not alone. I’ve learned that my best friend hates how small her boobs are after having children. Does she have any idea that I would GLADLY give her some of mine to make her happy and my back hurt a little less every day?

We must stop body shaming ourselves. Nothing about that is okay. Nothing about disliking our bodies is acceptable. We are women and we are beautiful.

Step 2: Love who you are.

I’ve had a hell of a year for the past three years. I’ve realized that I carry that baggage with me every single day. I have somehow lost who I am and decided that who I am now isn’t worth loving. How can I expect anyone to love me if I don’t even love myself? The answer is simple: I can’t. I must first begin to appreciate the small things about myself. I now begin every single day by telling myself three affirmations about myself.

I am bright

I am driven

I am beautiful

These things are important. These things help remind me that I’m more than the bad day I’m having. I’m more than the guy that hasn’t texted me back. I’m more than the hours I spend at work. I’m more than the money I spend, the car I have, the family I lack, the friends I don’t always trust, and the garbage I tolerate from people.


Step 3: No more bullshit.

I mean this in every single aspect of your life. Stop tolerating bullshit from your family, your coworkers, your friends, your love interests, and most importantly, YOURSELF. The very last person you should be allowing any bullshit from is yourself. The others are dealt with on a one by one basis, whereas you can deal with you and your bullshit every single day. You are responsible for catching your slip ups. You are responsible for realizing when you’re not being very kind to yourself. You’re responsible for calling yourself out when you’re not working as hard as you know you can.

Most importantly, you owe yourself a massive apology. I owe myself one hell of an apology. Apologize and apologize often, but only to yourself. You aren’t perfect by any means, but who actually is? Kim Kardashian literally got famous for a sex tape with Ray J. She’s not perfect and no one else is either. You create your own happiness, and that begins with YOU. Stop body shaming, start loving yourself, and stop tolerating bullshit and toxicity in your life to continue.

Start apologizing to yourself and begin loving every single part of who you are.

You’re worth it, I promise.

Indiana University. B.A. English.

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