To the guy who missed out: I have hope for you.
I hope many things for you, but most of all, I hope you see the error in your ways and the destruction in your poorly made choices. I hope you wake up with regret on your mind and longing in your body. I hope you realize that girls like me don’t come around very often and when they do, you’re not supposed to disregard their feelings because it’s inconvenient for you. I hope you see that being alone isn’t always the answer and having someone around that cares about you is important.
I hope you see how great things could have been.
I hope you no longer feel my lips against your neck or my head on your chest. I hope your sheets still smell like me and my hair lingers in the dark corners of your room. I hope when you feel a cold creeping up, you seek but no longer receive it. I hope that the next time you think tequila is the answer, you hear my long drawn out “nooooooooo.” I hope that when you’re in a bar and you hear a loud girl’s laugh, you hope it’s mine. I hope the next time you unzip a girl’s dress, you remember when it was mine. I hope you’re more careful with the next girl you kiss at a concert. I hope the next girl you have in your bed doesn’t have a heart. I hope that a faint thought of me crosses your mind every time you drive past a Taco Bell. I hope you avoid my favorite bars and any block near my house.
Most importantly, I hope you realize what you’ve lost.
Although I have hope for you, I also want you to understand something. You let me down. You were supposed to be one of the good ones. You were supposed to be the nice guy. You were supposed to be the guy that took me home after a long night out and didn’t try to take advantage of me. You were supposed to be the guy that tried to get me Dunkin Donuts the morning after a long night of drinking. You were supposed to be the guy that kissed my forehead with my head on your chest. You were supposed to be the guy who understood my weirdness, but found it charming. You were supposed to be THAT guy, but instead you turned out to be different. Instead, you turned out to be the guy that hurt me. I know you didn’t mean too, but it happened and you never even apologized for it.
I still have hope for you.
I hope that this is a lesson learned. I hope that when you text me and see my read receipts are on, but I haven’t responded, you understand why. I hope that you see that women are not expendable and we do have feelings. I hope you know that even the loud ones laughing have insecurities too. I hope you think of me next time. I hope I’ve left some type of imprint on you, and not just in your bed. I hope you realize what you’ve missed out on and you never take another chance like that for granted.