Everyone goes through times of self-doubt and insecurity. But what should you do if you find yourself falling out of line towards who you really are as a person? Sometimes our faults and bad habits get the better of us and we need to work to take back control.
If you don’t like who you are becoming, there is a way to change that for the better. First, before you take action, you have to be able to think critically and with a clear head. Here are 11 questions to ask yourself to get started.
1. Who am I?
Allow yourself the time to take a look at the person you are today. How would you describe yourself honestly? What are the positive and negatives? It’s easy to get caught up in an idealistic version of who we are that it becomes very different from reality. If you are someone who wants to change yourself for the better, it’s important to first understand who you really are at this moment. You can’t move forward unless you have an accurate representation of who you are.
2. Am I truly happy?
On a scale of 1 to 10, how happy are you really? Take some time to really examine your moods and emotions throughout the day and overall. How satisfied and content are you with your current situation and lifestyle? If you can consider yourself unhappy more than happy, then that’s when you know you might need to make some changes.
3. What do I want to change about myself?
Ask yourself exactly what it is about who you are that you don’t like. It could be a habit, a personality trait, a living situation, a job, etc. You need to be able to identify the source of your unhappiness. Write down a list of things you want to change about yourself and about your life.
4. What can I change right now?
Take the list you just wrote and think about how many of those things you can change as soon as possible. What can you do today, tomorrow, in a week, in a month? Keep in mind that you might not be able to change everything right away, and you can’t change other people. However, you can do something about the way you respond to people and things in your life.
5. What have been your achievements in the last 3 years?
This is a good thing to ask because while you may need to make improvements in your life, you also need to give yourself credit for the things you have accomplished and everything that is good about who you are. It’s always good to use these positive things to build upon any skills or talents you may have.
6. What are your mistakes?
Think about the things you have done that you may wish you hadn’t. It’s okay to recognize them but don’t focus so much on beating yourself up. Everyone makes mistakes and everyone will have things they wish they could do all over again, and that is normal. However, it is important to take the lessons you learn from these moments and be able to move on.
7. Who do I admire?
Who do you find yourself looking up to? It could be a person you know, a historical figure, activist, etc.
Why do you admire this person? Use the people you think highly of to inspire you in your own journey. You don’t have to emulate exactly what they are doing, but you could get an idea for something that is more suited to your own interests and passions.
8. How much time do I really spend on my own self-care and self-interests?
It’s so easy to get caught up in the everyday hustle and bustle and neglect your own well being. It happens to the best of us, but ask yourself when the last time was that you took a day off just for yourself. Having time for your own self-care is essential for a better performance in all aspects of your life. You can’t be for everyone else if you aren’t taking good care of you.
9. How can I be more helpful to those around me?
Think about the family and friends you love. In what ways can you help them out in times of need? It doesn’t have to be anything extravagant. Maybe someone needs a babysitter or a ride to work. A huge part of becoming a better person is to truly care for the ones you love and help them in the little ways that you can. Your perception of yourself will start to improve when you know that you are making a positive impact on the lives of those who are important to you.
10. What are you grateful for?
Everyone has moments when they feel like their life sucks, but if you really take a step back, you will find there are also a lot of things in your life to be grateful for as well. Take time to really appreciate the people and things that make your life better and more enjoyable in some way.
11. What are you most inspired and motivated by?
What gets you pumped up and motivated to make a change? It could be a cause that you are passionate about or simply an experience you went through that had an impact on your life. Use those things as inspiration to get off your tush and do something.