When You Lose Someone You Love

Claudia Heidelberger
Claudia Heidelberger

I’m sorry.

I’m sorry the person you loved died.

I’m sorry we’re not better friends, that I haven’t earned the right to be there for you.

I’m sorry that when I heard the news, all I could think about was how your life just changed in a split second and you had no idea what hit you. That one phone call had the power to bring you to your knees. ANdI don’t know what to say to you, because there are no words that can possibly make this better or take the edge off of this pain.

I’m sorry that you now know what it’s like to hurt so much that you can’t breathe because the pain is crushing your lungs and it feels like your heart is literally breaking. And that now, you think there was something you could have done differently and then maybe this wouldn’t have happened. There wasn’t.

I’m sorry that this will break off a piece of you forever and there’s nothing you can do to be whole again. You’ll stop crying eventually but you’ll never be the same person you were.

I’m sorry that for the next year, people will pat your back and look at you with sad, knowing eyes. But they won’t really know.

I’m sorry that you are one of those people now, the ones that have had someone close to them suddenly ripped away forever. The ones that have to rebuild their lives when they thought, “this is it.”

I’m sorry about the coffee mug in the sink that will haunt you for weeks, until you finally have the strength to wash it and put it away.

It will feel terrible.

I’m sorry that your days are empty and you just go through the motions, because the person you always put before yourself is no longer there. I’m sorry there are no guarantees but one: life is too short. For the person you loved, for you, for me, for everyone.

I’m sorry that not everyone knows what it’s like to have loved someone with their entire heart, soul and body the way you do.

I’m sorry I know how you feel. TC mark

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