It’s Okay To Fight For Love

Flickr / Leo Hidalgo
Flickr / Leo Hidalgo

Many people say that you shouldn’t have to fight for love. They say that if you were really with “the one,” everything should just come easily and fall into place without any struggle.

Well, I disagree, and I’m talking from experience.

I met him a little over a year ago. We started talking every day and he sent me into a whirlwind of euphoria. Soon enough, I was falling in love. The I-don’t-want-to-go-to-sleep-because-I don’t-want-to-ever-stop-talking-to-him kind of love; the my-heart-beats-out-of-my-chest-every-time-he-kisses-me kind of love; the I-get-butterflies-every-time-he-talks-to-me kind of love. And it was the most exhilarating feeling I’ve ever felt in my life. Soon after, I knew I wanted to spend my life with this man. I knew that I could never love anyone else like I love him. I knew that he was “the one.”

But then I broke his heart. Why would I hurt someone who I felt all of these feelings for? Why would I do anything to ruin what we had? I ask myself these questions every day. For a short period of time, he started to have doubts. Not really about me or us, per say, but our situation. We are many years apart, so some things we were on different pages for. But instead of making myself have doubts, too, I should have proved his wrong. I should have proved to him that what we had was real, and that even though we were writing different pages at the moment, we could still work together and compose an amazing book. But I didn’t do that. Instead, I found someone else and lied about it; the worst thing I could’ve done because not only did it break his heart, but also it broke the trust he had for me.

I could walk away right now. I could walk away from this terrible nightmare that has left me crying every day for the past few months. But walking away from it would be walking away from a person who has turned my world right side up; from a person who has made me smile until my cheeks hurt and laugh until I cry; from a person who has been there for me since day one, who has wiped the tears strolling down my cheeks, and has loved me through everything.

If we don’t end up together again, I have no one to blame but myself. But in the meantime, I’m going to fight. I believe that life is way too short to let go of things that make you happy. It’s too short to give up on things that bring you warm, fuzzy feelings and a big, cheesy smile to your face.

Don’t give up on love. I won’t.

I fight for him and us every day, and I will continue to. I will fight to show him that there are many, many chapters left to write in our book, and that we shouldn’t close it before we even get to begin.

The test of love is not when you are together and things are perfect, rather, it is when you are going through hell and despite that, the love is still there.

And, the love is still there all right. After a year, I still get those same butterflies every time he talks to me. My heart still pounds out of my chest every time his lips touch mine. I get chills just from his gentle touch. It’s love. And no matter how much time passes, those things will never fade. I want these feelings forever; they’re too great to let go of, and, so is he.

Oftentimes, extraordinary love isn’t easy, but it’s always worth it. So don’t give up on it, and keep on fighting. TC mark

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