A Reminder To My Single Self: You Are Not Unlovable And You Will Be Okay

woman with red lipstick smiling
A L L E F . V I N I C I U S Δ / Unsplash

I know that there are moments when you enjoy your solitude. You enjoy living your life without compromising on what Netflix show to watch, what song to put on in the car, and where you want to go for dinner. You appreciate not having to adhere to someone else’s schedule and having the freedom to do exactly what you want, when you want.

While you value all the moments of pure autonomy, I know that at some point it just doesn’t feel like enough. Night after night of lying in bed alone, shivering during the cold of the winter, and falling asleep with your mind racing with no one to share your intricate thoughts with, is enough to make your whole being feel hollow. I know that on the days that are the hardest, the days when you’re hanging on by the thinnest of threads, you’re wishing you could come home to someone. You want to share all those thoughts that are trapped in your head, you want to be heard. You crave that connection, you long for that person to hold you in their arms and assure you that you will be okay. Yet the truth is, nobody can promise that to you, but you CAN promise yourself. You can promise yourself that you are doing the best that you possibly can, you have made it this far on your own, and for that reason you will be okay.

Remember, you are not alone because you are unlovable. You are alone because you refuse to settle for any person that will make you feel just as alone while being beside you. You will not settle for someone who is there for a body, and doesn’t ask to hear what is going on in your mind. You are alone because you’d rather have a cold bed than let someone in it who doesn’t understand your worth. You will not settle for anyone who doesn’t see that you are a beautiful, caring, and strong being whose sexiness is not defined just by your body but also by your mind and soul. Your sexiness is your ability to continue to move forward, despite the lonesome nights and thinning threads, when your chest feels like it’s closing in and tears fall down your cheeks as you fall asleep. In spite of all that, you continue to wake up every day and take on the world, all by yourself. TC mark

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