We Had Love, But We Lacked Faith

Overhead shot of man and woman laying on backs on walkway outdoors
Toa Heftiba / Unsplash

Some nights, I lay awake and pray that my feelings for you will dissipate, but I’m starting to doubt if that is even possible. I pray that when I wake up, your laugh isn’t ringing quietly in my ear and that your smiling face doesn’t appear in my memories, but that is turning out to be impossible as well.

Your blue, soft spoken yet bold, eyes kill me. Your glare is deadly and looking into your eyes triggers the butterflies I felt the day I first knew I loved you. I have to believe we are not meant for one another even though my heart hopes that’s not true.

Our love was too fierce to handle, it grew too big too fast and we are both in shambles because we were always trying to match our feelings and our actions and there were too many expectations on both ends.

The endlessness of your eyes and the deepness of your voice is embossed in my heart and I know I’ll never be able to let you go. You will be a story I tell my daughter. I’ll tell her that I hope she gets the chance to feel what you made me feel.

Things just never worked out the way we both envisioned. It was almost as if the entire world was rooting against us.

When I think of falling in love with someone I think of fate, but that wasn’t the case with us. We fell hard in love, maybe too hard, but it never felt like fate. It never felt like we were absolutely meant to be together, because as much as we loved each other, no matter how hard, harder things came between us.

If I could, I would spend the rest of my life looking into your eyes, but I can’t see through the tears when it comes to you and I can’t bear to see tears fall out of those perfect eyes of yours.

Love and fate oftentimes come hand-in-hand and that was our problem. TC mark


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