My Best Friend Is Finally Watching ‘Buffy The Vampire Slayer’ So Now I’m Dead

I, Ari Eastman, am many things. A daughter, friend, cat mom, poet, neurotic goofball, a gluten-free babe, etc. I mean, honey, the list goes on and on! But of all the many, many things I am, there’s one in particular I don’t make shy. I’m an unapologetic Buffy aficionado, complete with the iconic “B” logo tattooed on my hip, much to my mother’s disappointment.

So yeah…I eat, live, and breathe Buffy. Think about that annoying girl you went to high school with who was disturbingly into Disneyland. That’s me. But instead of Mickey Mouse, I’m waxing poetic about The Chosen One. I’m geeking over the Hellmouth and yelling that Riley WAS A WASTE OF OUR TIME!

Imagine my joyous surprise when one of my best friends, the internet’s collective mom, Kendra, told me after 3 years of knowing me was finally committing to the Buffy The Vampire Slayer experience. I’m not saying I cried. I’m not saying I wept. I’m not saying I spontaneously orgasmed. I’m not saying a lot of things.

Knowing all seven seasons of Buffy is like a mother knowing her child is going to learn about the world and there are certain things you should prepare her for and others she must learn on her own. I’m attempting to give Kendra a spoiler free environment but there will be times my own eagerness will shout, “HAVE YOU SEEN ______ YET?”

Right now, she’s on season 2 and her commentary is about as pure and lovely as anyone would expect. It’s like I’m experiencing it all over again and omg, MY EMOTIONS! AH!!!!

I want to document this. Her excitement. Her discoveries. My pride. My crying (SHUT UP, I’M A PISCES).

Join us. This is just the beginning.

This is the start of a gorgeous new era.