12 Things Every Naturally Loud Girl Will Relate To
By Ari Eastman
1. Being told to stop yelling when you definitely did not think you were yelling.
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WHAT DO YOU MEAN I’M BEING LOUD? THIS IS JUST MY NATURAL SPEAKING LEVEL.
2. Teachers were constantly telling you, “Use your inside voice.”
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This seems like pretty vague advice considering everyone’s idea of what an ‘inside voice’ sounds like is different. Sure, Bobby is over there whispering, but he’s a weirdo and always whispers, inside OR outside. You can’t help it if you have good projection.
3. Everyone thinking you are upset about something when you’re actually fine.
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You can’t help it if you speak with passion.
4. You have a super distinct laugh that can be heard down the block.
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It’s like an earthquake. A joyous, contagious earthquake.
5. Your scream is blood-curdling. Seriously.
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Someone should cast you in a horror film, ASAP.
6. On the rare occasions you’re more on the silent side, people get really weirded out.
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“Are you alright? Did someone die? Why are you not talking?” Um – you’re fine. You can have quiet days, it DOES happen.
7. Being paranoid that everyone secretly (or not) finds you annoying.
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Guys? You still love me, right? Even though I’m shrill?
8. Growing up, people called you “bossy” just because of your voice.
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No, you’re not bossy. You just have strong vocal cords.
9. Literally not knowing how to whisper.
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Like this? *loud whisper* AM I DOING IT RIGHT?!
10. During group oral projects in school, people let you take the lead.
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Um, can you guys say something? This is a GROUP project, not the Me Show.
11. You can’t sneak up on people.
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Which is probably okay because it’s a creepy skill to be good at. But you definitely never got away with that hand over eyes “SURPRISE” move to your buddies on the playground. Why, you ask? Because they could hear you coming.
12. People make jokes that your volume translates to the bedroom.
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…and, um, they’re not exactly wrong…