19 Things All Recovering Emo Kids Were Definitely Guilty Of

"Misery Business" - Paramore
“Misery Business” – Paramore

1. You had those weird, ugly, plastic sex bracelets. You did not do any of the sexual things they indicated, but still definitely wore them. And lied to your Mom about what they meant.

2. Your AIM away message was always angsty lyrics. You took turns between Taking Back Sunday, Dashboard Confessional, and Motion City Soundtrack.

3. You loathed kids who typed LiKe ThIsSsS. You rolled your Raccoon Eyeliner eyes whenever you came across writing like that. But also, they were probably more popular than you were.

4. And speaking of eyeliner, you went heavy on the under eye. You looked like you used actual black crayons for make up tools.

5. You either were in love with and/or wanted to be Hayley from Paramore. Because you had the fattest crushcrushcrush.

6. Band t-shirts were your preferred aesthetic. Merch tables at concerts were your Nirvana and your wallet’s nightmare.

7. “You just don’t understand” was your personal motto and anthem. You were SURE you were just too deep for anyone to possibly comprehend. Special Snowflake Syndrome at its finest, Babe.

8. You wrote at least one fanfic. Or if not, you secretly read it.

9. Warped Tour was like a second Christmas to you.

10. You were O-B-S-E-S-S-E-D with the idea of dating a musician or artist. They would just get it, you know?

11. You doodled all over your body with a Sharpie to see how a future tattoo would look.

12. You were jealous of kids who could get cool piercings. And if you were one of those lucky few, you never stopped talking about it. “Oh yeah, well this place I got my septum pierced…”

13. Your Myspace photos were all taken at a high angle with your body looking awkwardly small in the background. You were a Selfie Master before the term was even born.

14. You told people your favorite color was black. And you weren’t joking.

15. You experimented with the “bangs covering one eye” hairstyle. You thought it made you SUPER hardcore.

16. You had a LiveJournal or a private blog where you wrote all about your feelings.

17. You always wore your Converse sneakers. You were basically like a cartoon character who always has on the same outfit. Those lace up ones, though.

18. In the shower, you could be found singing/screaming, “I CHIME IN WITH A HAVEN’T YOU PEOPLE EVER HEARD OF CLOSING THE GODDAMN DOOOOOOR.”

19. You congregated with fellow Emos. Sometimes, you found them online. Sometimes, you spotted them at the mall outside Hot Topic. They were the perfect tribe your edgy heart desired. TC mark

Ari Eastman

✨ real(ly not) chill. poet. writer. mental health activist. mama shark. ✨

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