25 Flawless Quotes By Lorelai Gilmore That Remind Us Why She Is Ultimate Mom Goals

1. “I am the Oracle. I carry all the knowledge.”

2. “Why bother even calling it Final Destination 3. At that point just call it now you’re really really really dead!”

3. “If you’re gonna throw your life away, he’d better have a motorcycle!”

4. “I love pudding. I worship it. I have a bowl up on the mantel at home with the Virgin Mary, a glass of wine, and a dollar bill next to it.”

5. “Seventy-five thousand dollars. Seventy-five thousand dollars. Oh my God, that’s like 150 pairs of Jimmy Choos.”

6. “Ok, let’s be organized. Make it fast, make it snappy, and if there’s any impulse buying, make it chocolate.”

7. “Coffe please, and a shot of cynicism.”

8. “I managed to find Uno and Checkers, and Battleship and most of the pieces of Candyland. Which I figure, we can mix together to create a fabulous new game, Candyship Battleland. War never tasted so good!”

9. “Now what’s on the agenda for today? I hear there’s a shipment of plutonium coming in on the docks. And I thought we could dress up as nuns and you could fake a stigmata and you could put the plutonium under your habit.”

10. “I would like a cheeseburger, with a side of cheeseburger, and see if they can make me a cheeseburger smoothie.”

11. “This is it. She can finally go to Harvard like she’s always wanted and get the education that I never got and get to do all the things that I never got to do and then I can resent her for it and we can finally have a normal mother-daughter relationship.”

12. “I’m not perfect, okay? People make mistakes. I mean, Gwyneth Paltrow dyed her hair that dark brown. It was very unflattering. If she’s not perfect, how do you expect me to be?”

13. “You have so many years of screw-ups ahead of you.”

14. “And if eating cake is wrong, I don’t wanna be right.”

15. “Honey, relationships are hard.”

16. “I’m attracted to pie. It doesn’t mean I feel the need to date pie.”

17. “It’s all any of us wants, to find a nice person to hang out with ’til we drop dead. Not a lot to ask!”

18. “The drinks fortify us. The drinks give us strength. The drinks get us drunk.”

19. “I hate when I’m an idiot and don’t know it. I like to be aware of my idiocy, to really revel in it, take pictures. I feel we’ve missed a prime Christmas card opportunity.”

20. “We can’t be lost; we don’t know where we’re going.”

21. “Get back in your pajamas, go to bed, eat nothing but gallons of ice cream and tons of pizza.”

22. “No, Saturday is the day of pre-rest.”

23. “Don’t study so much that you get brilliant, go mad, grow a big bald egghead, and try to take over the world, OK? ‘Cause I want to go shoe shopping this weekend.”

24. “If it was physically possible to make love to a hot beverage, this would be the one.”

25. “They always want to ask about your mother. It’s OK. Say whatever you want. But make sure you start with ‘my mother’s very hot.'”