12 Reasons You’ll Never Get Over Seth Cohen

You ever wonder why your relationships fail? Are you possibly in love with any fictional characters? Because I’ve been secretly (not secretly) waiting for Seth Cohen to walk through my door…I still am. Leighton Meester, I curse you every night.
The O.C.
The O.C.

1. He’d Always Be Down For A Netflix Night

And even better, he’s going to know the best documentaries or indie flicks available for streaming. You can snuggle up, run your fingers through his wavy locks, and just spend hours and hours on the couch. This is my dream relationship, to be honest.

2. He Appreciates Collectibles

He’s not going to judge you for keeping a box of wine corks under your bed, or think you’re #basic for searching for seashells at the seashore. Captain Oats will stand guard, protecting whatever quirky thing you like.

3. He Doesn’t Realize His Own Hotness

Okay, self-love and confidence are both important to have, but the absolute ultimate lady-boner killer? Being a cocky dickwad (redundant?). Seth is that beautiful, rare bird who was completely overlooked for some weird reason. But as a result, he isn’t an asshole about his good looks. That face though..*drools a disgusting amount*

4. He’s Great With Parents

We all get nervous introducing a significant other to the fambam, but Seth is going to be perfectly charming, and just awkward enough that no one finds him threatening. Older generations really dig him. Seriously, you can drop him off in the retirement home and rest assured he’s going to walk out of there with new friends.

5. One Word: Chrismukkah

The O.C.
The O.C.

Seth is the perfect amount amount of both goy and Larry David. You could bring him home to Seder dinner (and Bubbie is gonna be through the roof), but also…Christmas! He’s open to all faiths, or maybe even lack of faith. You get the best of both worlds with this Jew(ish) babe.

6. He’s Artistic

He can paint you like one of his French girls, or you know, a comic book character. Seriously, you could inspire a whole damn series. YOU COULD LIVE FOREVER IN THE HANDS OF ADOLESCENT BOYS EVERYWHERE!!! (Wait, ew?)

7. His Dad Is Sandy Cohen

I actually want to be the mother version of Sandy Cohen one day. What a cool guy to just come over and hang with! He’s caring, hilarious, and you’d never feel uncomfortable just hanging at the Cohen residence. Sandy, you the real MVP.

8. He Could Make You A Killer Playlist

Even though it’s such an obnoxious thing to hear, he probably DID like that band before you ever heard of them. And being with someone who introduces you to new things? Fantastic. He can broaden your musical horizons and is likely to surprise you with tickets to a live show of a totally-about-to-blow-up-in-five-years band.

9. He’s Straight To The Point

The O.C.
The O.C.

YES. COHEN, I AGREE 100%!!

10. His Twitter Account Would Be Flawless

He’d be drowning in retweets because he is so damn funny and witty. Sethela, you might not have felt like much of a stud in high school, but babe, you’d be Social Media King. No doubts in my mind. Let those girls slide into his DMs all they want, you know he’d be coming home to you every night.

11. His Humor Can Get You Through The Dark Times

Do you know how much shit went down in The O.C.?? Like…a lot. People died. Cheated. Drug problems. Alcoholism. SCANDAL AFTER DAYUM SCANDAL. And who was there to save us with a funny quip when we needed a breather? The bae, Seth. When things get tough, he’s there making you laugh through it.

12. His Social Circle Is Small

Hear me out, this might sound kind of weird. But when people have a thousand friends, I find it a little suspicious. How do you have time?! Are those friendships even real?! I don’t know man, maybe I’m just too much of a homebody. But Seth has…a very tiny circle. So you know he’s got time for those important ones in his life. TC mark

Read this: 14 Surprising Ways Life Actually Gets Better After 25
Read this: 13 Things Homebodies Say And What They Actually Mean
Read this: The Ones We Try So Hard To Love

Ari Eastman

✨ real(ly not) chill. poet. writer. mental health activist. mama shark. ✨

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