Maybe I’m Not The Woman For You

My stomach sinks from waist down, I feel like my blood is drooping down, my knees start to get hurt and no matter how much I try to stand up, I won’t budge. I stare at the blank space, recalling everything we talked about, reminiscing how good you are to me when we first met, replaying scenes in my head from the time when you were giving me all the love in the world. Tears start to well up my eyes, emotions begin to flow from all over my body, the pain I felt inside my heart exploded and it consumed my whole body.

It pains me to know that this is how you think I should be treated. It hurts me that you think this is all I’m worth, this is what I deserve.

I’m not the woman worth your time to drive home, not the woman you brag to everyone about, not the woman worth your effort to surprise, not the woman worth the bother to check on from time to time, not the woman worth quitting your bad habits for, not the woman worth the trouble to go out for in the middle of the night when you desperately wanna see her, not the woman you’ll run after when you fight, not the woman you show to the world, not the woman you’d want to do everything to please.

You didn’t specifically told me those things, but you didn’t have to. Because isn’t it that when you love someone you’ll do everything to make her happy, you go out of your way because you want the best for her, you never, ever, make her feel unimportant. You don’t make her feel like everything for you takes effort and that it’s exhausting you. You don’t make her feel like a liability.

By the way you’re treating me, it’s showing me that you won’t think twice of leaving when things get a little rough, because you just love me when it’s convenient for you.