A good man respects his woman. That respect often stems from his relationship with his mother. If your man treats you like a queen, it’s due (at least in part) to the way he was raised.
But what happens when that mother son bond becomes a little too close for comfort? Is she always around? Do you find that your battling her for your boyfriend’s attention? At some point, mama bear needs to cut the apron strings and let him go. Here are 7 signs that you’re dating a total mama’s boy.
1. She’s His Personal Assistant
If you’re man is incapable of doing his own laundry, buying groceries or even making his own bed, it means he’s mommy’s little boy. And the worst part is, he probably loves every minute of it. I mean, can you blame him? He doesn’t have to lift a finger. His mother is at his beck and call, whipping up his favorite meals in the kitchen and scrubbing his toilet. And, I hate to tell ya, but she’s setting the precedent for what your man will expect from all women moving forward. You included!
2. She’s His Personal Piggy Bank
It’s bad enough if your boyfriend can’t wash his own underwear or make a PB&J but when he can’t support himself, you better start running. Now.
Does your man’s mother pay all his bills? From his insurance to his rent and car payment? And what about non-necessities? If your man is still receiving an allowance from mommy, it’s a sure sign that he’s a dependent mama’s boy with no intention of changing. Not to mention, if he’s not phased by taking money from his own mother instead of earning his own, he may be a gold digger in the making.
3. She Calls Constantly
We can all get a little jealous from time to time which leads to snooping and searching through your boyfriend’s phone. If 90% of the calls and text messages are from your boyfriend’s mother, you may have a mama’s boy on your hands. Another tell-tale sign is if she’s listed in his phone as “mommy”. Does your man’s mom call during the most inopportune moments? That’s not totally out of the ordinary but if your man is taking a break from your hot and steamy make-out session to answer a call from his “mommy”, you’ve got a problem.
4. She Shows Up Unexpectedly
What’s worse than your boyfriend’s mom calling him incessantly? How about her showing up at his apartment or barging into his room without warning? If your man’s mom is constantly showing up unannounced and ruining your dinner dates or snuggle time on the couch he needs to squash that shit. And if he refuses, in fear of upsetting his “mommy”, be warned – he’s a mama’s boy.
5. She Says Jump and He Asks “How High?”
Why is that we have to remind our partner 100 times to do one simple thing? Whether it’s pick up milk at the grocery store or change the oil in your car, men don’t always follow directions. But what about when your man’s mother asks him to do something? If he drops everything and runs to her or puts off doing something for you in order to please his mom, just know that this dynamic may never change. When she says “jump” he asks “how high?”, no matter the circumstances, and there’s no competing with that.
6. Her Opinion Matters Most
It’s bad enough when your man places more importance on his friend’s opinions that he does yours but that’s nothing compared to him listening to his mother’s advice before yours. Is he contemplating a career change? Moving into a new apartment? Or buying a dog? Even after a lengthy conversation where you feel that you’ve really gotten through to him, does he turn around and call his mother? Just to see what she would do?
What about that time you bought him a shirt that you knew he’d look amazing in, and he agreed, until his mother said she didn’t like it? Did he give it to his brother or change right before your date? They do say “mother knows best”. And it’s clear your mama’s boy agrees.
7. He Compares You to Her
This may be the worst of the worst. It’s bad enough when your man makes a snide remark or off the cuff, backhanded compliment that unintentionally makes you feel like crap. But when he says things like, “My mother puts sugar in her tomato sauce, why don’t you?” or “My mom’s skin is so much softer than yours. You should ask her what moisturizer she uses.” you may just lose your shit. Women don’t like being compared to their own mothers and they certainly don’t want to be compared to their future mother-in-law. If your man can’t help but hold you to his mother’s standards, you might have a Freudian situation on your hands.
Unless you find it sexy that your man is completely infatuated with his own mother, keep your eyes and ears out for these mama boy warning signs and get out while you still can!