The name of the two feet upon which I stand
And have built me up,
Piercing the horizon with the sharp edge of their confidence.
The ice is thin and quivers like an old rickety gate
But my heels are carved into the ground.
Looking up, the clouds part to reveal the golden fire
That I’ve been following, unblinking.
I’m hoping to figure out which path ahead is mine.
Everything yet nothing is uncertain.
I haven’t accepted that what I want everything to be
Can’t be anything but what it is.
Why I haven’t I owned up to the power
emanating from my palms like the sun radiating
For the whole universe to sit and watch awestruck ?
The road bends and turns into itself
And all that is left is a giant rubber band ball.
My body is tossed into the meandering rivers,
veering me off course yet again.
Gasping for breath, cold shivers rack my spine
In a strict pattern, always on beat.
Coughs echo in the thick of the ocean.
But the sole thought circling my inner ear
Tickling my brain,
Is that It’s a beautiful day to be alive
Because in today I am fortunate to struggle
And fall tens of times over in tears
Curled up in fetal position on my bed.
I am fortunate to feel this sadness
And this pain
Yet endure another day of more.
I want to be real.
I want to feel the deepest of sensations because
Only in those moments do I feel the Joie de Vivre.
I can tell myself that I lived
Despite the sword hugging my insides
Crying soft red tears onto the grass.
I can shout back to the darkness
And ask her to embrace me
Thank her for the pathways she failed to leave
For now I can see without the light.
I can speak words
And take in deep breaths of refreshing reality
Without choking on the soot
It’s a beautiful day to be alive and sad.
Or mad, or bored or empty, or lonely.
Because I can feel and that is a gift from god.
To merely exist and see the world shift.
Life is beautiful in its imperfections and never-ending tastes
In the adversity it deals us new flavors
And the uncertainty of our mere existence is the topper to the melting sundae. Eat it all up in one big gulp so that you can take in every tiny piece of it because the whole wouldn’t be the same whole otherwise.