My friend isn’t good about safe sex, but she isn’t bad about it, either. Not really bad. She’s just normal, I guess, at least from what she’s told me and from what I can tell.
And as hasty as it may sound, I’m almost certain I loved you.
How do they wake up one day and decide to get tested for HIV? Where do they find the courage?
You were the first person I kissed in college,
And it was weird,
Because we were sober,
And I was convinced that all hookups here would be.
I was wrong.
One day, you text me and ask why we haven’t spoken since we “hooked up.” I think I text back, “Because you raped me.”
I can’t remember if I ever wanted to say no. If I ever did want him to stop, I was really good at acting like I didn’t.
I didn’t think it was possible for a girl like me to find someone as special as you.
I spent the early morning handcuffed on the floor. Then I was handcuffed in the chair. Then eventually you did one of the only things you had ever done right by me. You let them know that I had zero part in the drug deals.
Wake up with alarm at 6 a.m.
This will hurt me more than it will hurt her, but I will do it anyway. This is the way it always ends.