woman in white t-shirt and blue denim jeans walking on gray concrete road during daytime

I Will Never Let Someone Silence Me Again

Sometimes the noise of life is overwhelming. At times I find it difficult to speak my truth and I feel guilty for allowing my own negative thoughts and the opinions of others to affect me in a way that silences my voice. And if I’m honest with myself, it has played a huge part in my vulnerability. I’ve been hurt in the past. A few years ago, I was abandoned and left in the dark by a boy who abused my emotions. At the time, I couldn’t understand how he walked away so easily. However, it was his self-arrogance that set me free. And I won’t apologize for this interjection because he should have taken a long look at his own reflection, especially after his careless deception.

Flash forward to the present and I guess you could say I still resent him for what he did to me. Over the years, I had to learn to pick myself up in order to heal on my own. It was disheartening to know I would never receive an apology from him. And after all this time, I still secretly wish for his sorry. But that’s not reality. He wasn’t sorry then, and that’s how our story ends. As I close that chapter in my life, I have found peace in the fact that it was never about me.

The truth is, it was him who was miserable. He made me out to be unreasonable for expecting a boyfriend who was faithful and respectful. Because every chance he had to belittle and berate me, he did. And when I stood up for myself, he would get defensive and insinuate I was being difficult. Meanwhile, I was the one to always light his candles, and yet he blew mine out.

So, I write this to say I don’t miss him, the low blows, his ego trips, or his narcissistic behaviors. Because it took years to find the courage to speak my truth. I now realize that I was and will always be better without him. Because I love myself and my opinions. So I will raise my voice as loud as I can, because it’s too big for my soul to withhold and my truth deserves to be told. I am resilient; I will never be silenced, as I will never be the same. This is my habitual truth, as I am becoming my authentic self on the path to gratitude.

About the author

Insider info, secrets, confessions, and guilty pleasures. You write it. We publish it.

Submit here.

Follow Anonymous on Facebook or read more articles from Anonymous on Thought Catalog. Learn more about Thought Catalog and our writers on our about page.