Loving You Was Simple But Now It Hurts

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Timothy Rose / Unsplash

loving you was simple, a walk in the park on a sunny day, a dip in the ocean with the sun beaming down. loving you was so simple, it just made sense. after the first day laying beside each other and the first day we were apart, longing to feel close again. I knew in an instant that I loved you, that your soul was made to mesh and mend with mine. I knew that it was going to be something rare, something life changing. I wanted the experience to reside in me like a home for the soul…. and it did and it still does. but now your gone. now the blue sky looks like your eyes, now the rain reminds me of the shower head drenching us while holding each other, the ocean reminds me of the boat and the days offshore with you, and the crescent moon reminds me of your smile. you’re everywhere and nowhere. I can’t stand to think that what we had just faded into the abyss, that all of our memories are out there somewhere, in the vast galaxy of the universe. I’m going to remember being intertwined with you for the rest of my life, I’m never going to forget the “I love you’s” and the words left unspoken. I’m never going to forget the broken look in your eyes when you talked to me about your past, I’m never going to forget the panic I felt when I knew you weren’t coming back. we’re apart now and it already feels like it’s been forever, forever and a day. a longer forever than I could’ve ever imagined. but I’m letting your image fade away in my head, I’m letting everything we had go and the future we had planned. I’m going to push aside all of those thoughts and replace them with the idea of having them with someone else. but maybe, just maybe, we will find each other again someday and maybe then, we will finally figure it out. that sense of revealing hope still mends my soul but I’m no longer allowing it to drown me. TC mark

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