To The Man Who Caused Me To Walk Away From My Engagement, Thank You

On the eve of my engagement to another individual, I met someone else. I know what you are all thinking, how dare this girl even think of talking to someone else? It wasn’t like that though. It was an unexpected, twisted event that caused me to rethink my whole life. As they say, the biggest decision you will ever make is the person you choose to be your life partner. I just happened to have my “moment of realization” when I looked through a different lens.

This person walked into my life when all was going well. I had just graduated from a doctorate program with high distinction, had an awesome job and was engaged to my long-term boyfriend. I had always done what was expected of me and followed the path of society’s definition of “success”.

All was going well per my resume, but without the piece of paper defining me, who was I?

At some point in everyone’s lives, there needs to be someone to challenge them and open their mind to new ideas. We get lost in a sea of constant movement when in reality we should want a storm. A storm with piercing winds and strong waves that shakes the boat of comfort. We grow most as individuals when we are put in uncomfortable situations.  

This person changed everything for me. He constantly intrigued me with his thoughts, words and humor. He was a good person with a large heart, who had been hurt too many times before. The most beautiful thing about him was his strong mind and old soul.

I walked off the beaten path for the first time in my life, and called off my engagement.

It was the best and toughest decision I have ever made. Throughout my life, I was so used to making calculated, precise decisions backed with evidence, but this I could not explain. This time, I followed my gut and my heart.

This person ignited a spark within my soul and for that I am truly grateful. He taught me never to settle for someone, never to live a life you aren’t 100% excited for and the challenging road may always be the best route. It is amazing how easy it is to get in a rhythm and not ask the question of “Am I truly happy with where I am at?” We all tend to settle on a job, friendships, career paths, but the one thing we should never settle on is love.

To this day, he doesn’t realize the impact he had on me. He challenged and changed my perception on what life should be with the “one”. So to him, thank you for everything.