It always sucks to lose friends, especially ones we’ve known for a long time. It’s especially hard being the one to cut the cord, even when you know the friendship isn’t right anymore. Somehow, we tend to be more tolerant towards friends than people we’re interested in romantically, expecting less, and willing to be treated in ways we don’t deserve. But any relationship that’s turned sour isn’t worth holding on to.
In our busy lives today, juggling work, school, friends, family, and relationships, we have to be selective about where we place our time and energy. And a lesson I’ve learned is that it’s worse to hold on to a poor friendship just because you don’t want to let go. It can be liberating to rip the band aid off and lose the friends that are just weighing you down, freeing you up for the relationships that really are worth your while.
1. The one who’s a bitch.
This type of friendship ends up being more work than fun. She’s the person you put up with for whatever reason, but don’t actually enjoy hanging out with anymore. She’s always putting you down, making snide comments and is just plain rude. It’s just stressful keeping her in your life and it’ll feel like a weight off the shoulders to finally cut the thread.
2. The one who doesn’t put in effort.
Honestly, why are you even bothering? Friendships take effort, particularly when we have busy lifestyles. This is the kind of friend that prioritizes everything but you, never bothers to text you back and is always bailing on plans. She’s not really interested in your life and only hits you up when she needs something. If she can’t make the effort, why should you?
3. The one who’s only there for a fun time.
We all know her. She’ll never commit to any plan until she knows who’s throwing the best party. She’s down to hang when you’re going somewhere cool or have a fun crew, but if there’s something more exciting going on she’s the first to ditch. She’s not interested in hanging out with you, she’s just interested in where the best time is.
4. The one who’s holding you back.
This is the friend that you used to have a great time with but now just seems a little, well, immature. Whether you’re taking a class together, or you work together, she doesn’t seem to care about anything other than having a laugh, and she’s taking you down with her. She might even be the one that’s always blackout at the bar five minutes in, and you always have to leave and take her home. She just hasn’t really grown up yet and it seems like she’s become more of a liability than a friend.
5. The one who just drifted.
This type of friendship is the hardest to let go of, because it’s not like there are any hard feelings really. It’s just that as you’ve both grown up, gone to college, moved cities, you’ve changed as people and maybe you’re not that close anymore. The thing is, its normal. If you don’t have much to say to each other anymore, you can still cherish the years of friendship while it lasted, and come to terms with the fact that you’ve just drifted. It’ll feel a lot better than trying to force things to be the way they used to be.