Why “Everyone Cheats” Is A Horrible Excuse

Match Point / Amazon.com
Match Point / Amazon.com

I was admittedly very naïve in my earlier years when it came to love. A happy childhood full of Disney movies gave me the wrong idea, and I imagine that most would be able to relate to this in some way. I had always been a bit of a romantic, wanting to sweep a girl off her feet and be that Prince Charming that I thought any girl would want. I had my successes and my failures while dating, but something I overlooked entirely was the prevalence of cheating in our relationships today. I have never cheated on any woman I’ve been with, and to my knowledge, I have not been cheated on either. However, through college I learned that it doesn’t matter what type of person you are or how you were raised. Everyone is capable of cheating, and here are just 4 recent stories I heard that seem to prove this.

  1. I worked with a girl who grew up in the suburbs with a stable family unit, solid values, and high academic goals. She was very kind to everyone and her first ever experience with partying was at a work happy hour. Still, she cheated on her high school boyfriend for at least a year before they broke up and is cheating on her current boyfriend as well.
  2. One of my best friends is the most reliable person I know. He would do anything for his friends and always sticks to his word. He also grew up in a good family and is running a successful business on his own. Yet he, too, recently admitted that he’s been cheating on his girlfriend with multiple women.
  3. A friend of mine had a long-term boyfriend who was cheating on her with her best friend of over 10 years.
  4. Over the last month I have had three acquaintances, two females and one male, all ages 28-30, cheat on their significant others that they are or were preparing to marry.

At a young age I believed that only asshole guys cheated. Then, as I grew older I thought maybe it’s just college students trying to figure things out. But now I know that cheating really has no demographic.

And I honestly have to ask — Why? How?

Why do you do this? To not be able to face a person and tell them that you don’t have feelings for them or aren’t ready for a relationship – and to instead lead them on for months or even years – is such a cowardly act. And how you can do this to someone who loves you so much? I recently dated a girl who loved me like no one had before. But I had to end the relationship because I didn’t feel the same. And it still took time for me to be able to sleep with another woman after experiencing love like that. I have seen the effect that cheating has had on some of my friends and I’m sure everyone has experienced that at some point. And although I will continue to date, I have lost some faith in relationships. So many women seem to be so worried about giving their heart to someone else. So, why do we do it? Why does something so damaging happen so regularly?

I hope to open up a discussion about this; if we learned to communicate what we wanted out of a relationship, we’d all be much better off. TC mark

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