18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23; I’m turning 23 this year, but still no signs of love.
Friends around me have all found someone they are crazy about by now; and those who are single like me have had at least a few relationships under their belt. Me? Zilch.
My relationships with the opposite gender have always been hazy on both sides. I’ve missed opportunities because I didn’t know how to approach the boys I liked to show them I was interested; I’ve unintentionally led on people who were interested in me because I thought they were being nice since we were friends; and I had my heart broken by a man who I thought was the one. When I confessed to him, he said he didn’t feel the same way.
Guys came into my life and went, but none made the shift from my friend to my boyfriend.
Sometimes I doubt I’ll ever find somebody who can really understand me and love me for who I am. I’m also afraid I’ll find someone who meets all my criteria, but is again, already taken; or worse, has no interest in me.
Why is love making me wait so long? I too want to love and be loved.
Over the years, love has taught me that people aren’t perfect. I’m not perfect and I shouldn’t put the person I love on a pedestal and have them destroyed in front of my eyes when they make a mistake and fall from grace.
Love has taught me to speak up and articulate my feelings despite risking heartache; because finding someone you can mesh well with is truly one in a million. Don’t lose that chance.
Love has taught me to be sensitive with other people’s feelings after I had my own heart broken. I wouldn’t wish that agony on anyone.
And love has taught me to love and cultivate myself, so I can share the best parts of me with my love when I meet him.
Being single all these years has taught me these lessons.
At this point in my life, I believe I’m ready to let that guy enter my world.
Waiting is perhaps a test of my patience and my candor and capability in finding and keeping my love. I suppose you can’t really love another if you haven’t learned what love is.
Have I shown persistence in the face of failure blowing up in my face?
Have I learned to be kind and loving to others?
Have I faced my own inner demons and grown from each experience?
Am I willing to risk hurting myself again in the process of finding true love?
Am I ready to take care of another through thick and thin and pull through in the challenges we’ll face in our future?
Yes, I’m ready to welcome a best friend and an adventure partner to together brave the challenges of this world.
He’ll be the anchor that keeps my feet on the ground and I’ll be the wings that keep his heart in the cloud.
I’m here, waiting for you.