1. It’s inconsiderate to complain to your heavier friend about gaining a pound, until you become heavier than them. So I have to install a mental filter in case a casual comment like “hmm, my skinny jeans are a bit tight today” slips out. It’s okay for the heavier friend to say it though. Then it’s my responsibility to reassure her that she’s not fat, in fact she looks really pretty and slim, while avoiding a response like if I’m slim then what are you? This quickly becomes an old, vicious cycle… and I always lose. I’ll go home feeling stressed and guilty when I haven’t done anything wrong. Later when the guilt subsides (it doesn’t take long), I hate my heavier friend for having stressed me out. She can take her fat self and her insecurities to hell, I think, in my momentary rage.
2. Everyone thinks you barely eat. One time I went down to a café in my neighborhood and ordered a sandwich and a bowl of soup. The waiter glanced at me and asked if I wanted a half a sandwich instead because that’s a lot of food. I was pretty sure I could finish it, but too surprised by his question that I just said okay.
3. On the other hand, I admit… it’s probably true that I can’t finish as much food as other people. This sucks when I have to choose for example, between a vanilla or chocolate cupcake. I wish I could get both but I know that I won’t even be able to finish one.
4. Nothing fits right. The kid’s section doesn’t count because I’m not 12 anymore and I’d like my clothes to reflect that. I can forget about online shopping too, at least until I learn to cut and hem like a pro. If I want to wear a strapless dress, I’d better safety pin it to my bra, and maybe use some duct tape too just in case (no one’s going to see).
5. Arm bands slip off within the first 5 minutes of a run, so I have to hold my iPod. That’s a significantly higher risk of dropping and shattering a $200 gadget so vital to the majority of people’s existence, that they would rather forgo sex than it.
6. So many chubby or even normal sized girls (and some guys too, I suppose… not trying to be sexist) think that if they could just lose x amount of pounds, their lives would be perfect. Because all skinny people get straight A’s in school and go on to become billionaires? Haha I wish, but that’s bullshit. It’s great if you want to lose weight and be healthy… but that’s only one aspect of your life. Meanwhile, I’m not sorry for failing to live up to your false skinny people standards.
7. No one believes you work out. In fact, people generally think you’re physically incapable of anything more than taking ten steps from the front door to your car. I once asked a girl for directions to walk to the grocery store and she told me it’s about half a mile down the street… but you’re so skinny, you’ll be a skeleton by the time you get there! I wonder what she’d think if she saw me coming back with heavy groceries in both hands.
8. Your friends ask you what it’s like to be so skinny, when you wouldn’t dare ask what it’s like to be so fat. This doesn’t annoy me that much but I can never come up with a good answer. I don’t know what it’s like to be anything but myself.