1. He won’t leave his girlfriend for you – Getting involved with a man who is in a relationship with someone else when you meet them is a terrible idea. You WILL be hurt. He WON’T leave his girlfriend for you. It doesn’t matter how many promises he makes to you, or how much he tries to convince you that he needs to wait until [insert really specific event/time/situation ] to break things off with her. It does not matter if you were friends first. It does not matter if you felt a serious “connection” between the two of you. Relationships should begin fresh and should not be built on a shaky foundation of lies. Evaluate your role in the situation and then promptly get off that emotional rollercoaster before you do any more damage.
2. Your friends are probably right – When you are with a man that all of your friends are warning you against, chances are they are right to caution you against said fool. Your friends are either speaking from experience or from a place of common sense that your love-sick self cannot comprehend at the moment. Next time you ask your best friends for some advice about the toxic relationship that is keeping you up at night, actually take their advice. Your friends only want to make sure you are happy, safe, and emotionally stable. That is more than can be said about previously mentioned fool. Your friends being right
3. You need to put yourself first, and no that’s not selfishness – There is nothing wrong with wanting to support others and devoting as much of yourself as you can to helping those you love. However, it is critical to remember that you must have your own back first and foremost. You must advocate for yourself and avoid situations in which you are constantly sacrificing yourself and your well-being. You need to fight against the “people pleasing” personality that leads you to be passive/quiet in situations and agree to things when you are just merely trying to avoid confrontation.
4. Forgive yourself – You are not perfect. You are human. You are flawed. If you agonize over your every little mistake you will go crazy. Take a deep breath and ask yourself, “will this really matter tomorrow, next week, or even next year?” The answer is usually no. When you do truly mess up, then you need to admit your mistake, try your best to make things right, and then move on. Stress is a silent killer girl, and you are digging your own grave with all that anxiety.