16 Things I Will Never Be Too Old To Do

The Emperor's New Groove
The Emperor’s New Groove

Turning 18 doesn’t mean you automatically have to stop doing all the fun stuff you did when you were a kid.

Neither does turning 20.

Or 23.

Or, like, 76.

I’ll never be too old to:

1. Hop on the back of a shopping cart and command whomever I am with to “PUSH MEEE!”

2. Wear rain boots and jump in every puddle I see. Even the baby puddles need love.

3. Use my warm breath to try to spell my name in the air on a cold day. Pro tip: maybe don’t do this one around people if you don’t enjoy receiving dirty looks.

4. Take two different colored gummy bears, behead one and chomp off the lower half of the other, then stick them together to create a SUPER BEAR. Same applies to worms, frogs, and other gummy creatures.

5. Take kids’ vitamins because who the crap wants to take pills every day when they can eat sour dinosaur gummies?

6. Use the force on automatic doors to open them. Also – act like I used my mind to close a door if it happens to get blown shut by the wind.

7. Color in coloring books. Put my beautiful creations on my refrigerator.

8. Watch Rugrats, SpongeBob, Full House, and every other good show from the 90’s and early 2000’s.

9. Make a blanket fort and attempt to live in it for as long as possible. If anyone wants to help me figure out a method of plumbing let me know.

10. Sprint up the stairs when it’s dark at night and I am certain I’m being chased. Even when I’m elderly… I will hop on my chair lift and accelerate.

11. Hug my mom.

12. Carefully group and organize my candy by color/shape/flavor before eating it.

13. Blow bubbles/pop bubbles/pop bubble wrap/take bubble baths/take interest in anything with the word “bubble” in it.

14. Wear footsie-pajamas. No shame.

15. Watch “The Emperor’s New Groove.” I will watch that movie until the day I die.

16. Use bendy straws. Because every beverage is more fun when it travels in an unconventional way up the straw.

What other things will you never grow out of? TC mark

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