I have spent so much wasted time looking for hints in your sentences.
So much time letting you tread in the shallow waters of my consciousness.
I’ve become attached to a mirage.
I know you still care about me but I think what it comes down to is you were torn between wanting to be with me and being realistic.
I know you are lost in your new crusade now and I feel dumb that I get mad and even more foolish when you remember me again and the anger instantly melts away.
Maybe wasted time isn’t what it was. I just want to understand.
And I think I do now.
You are, in a way, the same as me, but different.
Always honest even when it’s brutal.
I knew when I met you that there was something about you that was going to change something about me.
And even now I can see the truth in that. You sat with me as I ventured outside of my comfort zone and it seems now I have forgotten that the comfort zone even existed.
You always believed in me.
You always looked at me like you knew me better than anyone ever had or would.
And I think you did. I think you still do.
I thought I knew what we were supposed to be but I was wrong.
You have taught me that time and distance don’t have power over a real connection.
And if I had a choice to care less I wouldn’t want to.
I have a tendency to hold my breath and jump right into things, investing my whole heart.
I give my all to people who may not deserve it (even though I think you did)..but just maybe…. I can give people something to believe in.
The thing about wearing your heart on your sleeve is that you don’t realize it at the time but you change the way others love by showing them exactly how to do it …….even if they leave.