This Is What Dating You Feels Like

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Dating you feels like wonder. It’s warm. It’s calm. It’s easy. It feels like I have a person in this world to talk to and lean on at any moment of the day. It’s funny. It’s serious. It’s cozy. It’s friendly. It’s comfortable. It’s home.

Dating you is terrifying. It’s hard. It’s overthinking and overtaking and over worrying. It’s questioning the things I’ve said hours after I’ve said it. It’s prepping my responses for a fight we haven’t had yet. It’s lonely. It’s insecure. It’s guessing and not knowing. It’s not being able to look at you when I tell you the things I’m ashamed of. It’s not having the guts to tell you the things I’m ashamed of.

Dating you feels like the best thing that has ever happened. Dating you feels like there’s no way it can last. Dating you feels like I’ll never have to date anyone else in this world again. Dating you feels like a breakup is right around the corner. Dating you feels like not trusting my own feelings.

Dating you feels like questioning how much I know. Dating you feels like ‘miss you’s and almost ‘I love you’s but don’t say it yet’ and the ‘I can’t wait I can’t wait I can’t wait to see you again’s.

Dating you feels like hiding my phone for an entire day because we’re moving too fast. Dating you feels slow and full of time. Dating you feels like wondering how long I’ll feel this way, if it is like the other times I felt this way and then didn’t.

Dating you feels like magic. Like I’m a whole part of another whole. Like I have a partner in this life to do this life with. Dating you feels like I could never be lonely. Dating you feels like leaning and not falling.

Dating you feels like tripping and falling.

Dating you feels like having no idea what I’m doing, every single day. Dating you feels like doing it anyways. Dating you feels like looking forward to being with you in days that haven’t happened yet. Dating you feels like not being able to picture a future together. Dating you is looking forward to writing a piece called ‘What loving you is like’. Dating you is never being able to write that piece.