This Is What I Used To Think Happiness Was Before I Actually Found It

Brooke Cagle
Brooke Cagle

Before I thought happiness was a burst of positive emotions that would only be for a small amount of time.

I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s more a calm sensation that makes you smile every now and again. While happiness comes with the company one keeps, it shouldn’t be the only thing that defines it.

In the past month, I’ve managed to come out a lot stronger than I thought I was. I also learned that no matter what, I have to retain my sense of individuality. I know where I make mistakes and that in itself is an accomplishment.

While our happiness shouldn’t rely on others, we fail to realize toxicity from others does affect our well-being in so many ways. There’s two types of negativity that people bring and I’ve learned to distinguish them by separating them into categories.

The first type of negativity is when someone tries to put you down for no reason but to bring your spirits down. The other type of negativity isn’t negativity as much as concern where someone doesn’t want you to get your hopes down. The issue is that unless you’re putting yourself in life threatening situations it shouldn’t be a concern.

We only learn from life when we take big leaps without looking. And that’s what I’ve been doing. I’ve managed to conquer my fear of heights and my next conquest is to learn how to dance. But on a more subconscious level my biggest conquest is to get over my anxiety of speaking about how I feel without worrying about what others think. I think that has been my biggest barrier with people.

While these problems may seem big at the moment, I know if I overcome them, it’ll lead to more happiness in my life.

I know that every bad thing that happens can only be met by two reactions. To either stay stuck on something you can’t change or to learn from it. I used to dwell on things that weren’t in my control, which made me unhappy. Now I know that if I can’t learn from it or change it, then I have to move on.

I can say that I’m the happiest I’ve been for a long time because I’ve learned happiness relies on myself. Even if it means I have to be a little selfish, I’ll take that chance. I know that when I do that, I’ll attract positive people in my life. In some pseudo psychological way, the law of attraction works in that regard.

Work hard and you’ll get what you deserve. Be selfish if you feel you’re not a top priority in your life. The saying is true that you can’t make everyone happy but you can make yourself happy. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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