No One Told Me About Loving You, And Then Losing You

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When people ask me if I am fine, I tell them I’m fine.

No one told me how much my life would change with you in it, and how amazing it would be to have this journey together for longer.

No one told me that I would have to make the hardest decision of my life within minutes. I never knew how much I would cry from not knowing how much I would miss you without ever really knowing  you.

No one told me that even after you were gone, my body wouldn’t know but that my mind would keep looking for you, knowing it was impossible to find you.

No one told me that weeks and months after losing you, I would try so hard not to cry alone in bed, wishing you had never left and that I had held on to you for longer.

No one told me that in the days to come, everyone who saw me would feel sorry for me but wouldn’t know the right thing to say, because there is nothing they could say to make it right.

No one told me that I would never not smile again, or that the sadness in my eyes would never hide itself from the world, even if I tried.

No one told me that whenever I saw someone like you, my heart would break again and I would wish that I could see nothing at all.

No one told me that it was possible to feel the pain of someone’s loss for so long, given how little I had known you for.

No one told me that my life would go on, but that a part of me would stop living. It’s strange how you came into my life and left so quickly – no one saw it coming, not even me.

No one told me that losing someone I barely knew would hurt this much, or that it was ever possible to love someone the way I loved you.

No one told me how much I would keep looking for you everywhere, while knowing in my heart that I would never find you. 

No one told me that the only place I would ever see you would be in my dreams, and that every time I would wake up to reality that image would be gone, and a part of me would wish that I lived in my dreams.

No one told me no matter how much I try to distract myself with every evil in the world – I couldn’t  stop thinking of you.

No one told me that no matter how much I tried to destroy myself, I wouldn’t stop missing you. I will never know if you came into my life to make it right or to say goodbye.

No told me that you would come back again even when I hoped and prayed that you would because I still miss you so much every day.

Someone did tell me that I would meet someone like you again, but no one told me it would actually be you. The only place I will ever find you will be in my dreams.

When people ask me if I am fine, I tell them I’m fine. I still lie. TC mark

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