You’re allowed to admit to yourself that you haven’t moved on. It’s alright to look at yourself in the mirror, and see how broken the person is staring back at you. Your feelings are valid. You’re allowed to feel the pain, regret, anger, and frustration. You have the right to scream, to release what’s inside your heart.
You’re allowed to still cling to the memories of your relationship with him. It’s okay if you don’t want to delete his number, and if you want to remain friends with him on Facebook. It’s okay to look at his picture, at his eyes, at his lips, and wish he’s still yours. It’s okay to miss him badly.
You’re allowed to feel your heart crack into tiny pieces.
You’re allowed to cry a great lake of tears, to shut down, to be in despair. You’re allowed to let yourself experience these terrible emotions, and immerse yourself into them. It’s alright to let your mind wander to the thought of him. It’s alright to remember the way his lips curve when he smiles, the way his eyes sparkles when he’s excited, the way his forehead crinkles when he’s upset.
You are entitled to long for him.
But at a certain point, you’re also allowed to pause and declare, “That’s it. I’ve had enough.”
You’re allowed to open the curtains in your window, and see the sunlight for the first time in what seems like forever. You’re allowed to haul yourself back up and decide to start anew. You have the right to wipe all the sadness that made a temporary shelter in your heart, and empty it, so it can be filled with hope again.
Because you are going to recover and to love yourself once more.
You are going to reconnect with your friends and family after all the times that you ignored them. You are going to do silly dance moves inside your room, and be comfortable on your own. You are going to drive with your windows down, look at the sunset, and realize that he has no effect on you anymore. Your heart no longer aches by remembering him. Your eyes don’t tear up anymore when his favorite song plays on the radio.
And you are going smile. Because you have made it – you have finally moved on. You have found the strength to let him go, and to let your memories together fade away.
Your heart is finally back to you. You have the opportunity to re-create yourself so you can find someone you can fall in love again. You don’t have to be afraid and think that history can repeat itself. You have to take risk and trust someone to take good care of your heart.
You’re allowed to be devastated and broken, but it doesn’t mean you should continue to live that way.
Because you deserve to experience a life that makes you feel excited to get out of your bed. You deserve to have a mind that is free from worries and anxieties. You deserve to have a heart that feels light, and only wants to be heavy with good memories.