Why do we stay somewhere we don’t belong? Why do we continue to put ourselves in a situation or be with somebody that we know isn’t right for us?
It’s almost engraved in our human nature to stay with the comfortable. To stay with the known, and feel the feelings of the familiar rather then leave when we know somebody has stayed far too long in our lives.
Growing up, almost every girl has the ultimate fantasy of being with the man of her dreams. A man that is willing to fight for her, not against her. Not only a man of integrity and honor, but also a man who only has a heart and set of eyes for her. The problem with the ultimate fantasy is that we tend to settle for way less than we deserve and stay somewhere we don’t belong. But what we fail to realize, is that by holding on halfway to someone we know we should let go and move on from, is actually a lot harder and more painful then to not have them at all.
1. If we stay holding on to the wrong one, the right one will never come along.
The true problem lies within the facts that we like to stick to what’s comfortable. We have this sick and twisted idea in our heads that we will never find anybody else. What we don’t realize though is that by never letting go of the wrong one the right one can never come into our lives. If we know somebody isn’t right for us, why do we continue to hold on with the tightest grip possible? When you keep looking through the rearview mirror you’re missing what’s actually happening through the windshield.
2. You convince yourself he makes you happy, but deep down you know that’s not the truth.
You try to believe the lies yourself that you tell everybody else. When something is right, it feels right. Being with the one should make you the best, healthiest version of yourself. Although every relationship can go through hardships and difficult times, overall it should consistently make you a better person. When you’re with the wrong person, everybody including yourself knows it.
3. You should be head over heels in love with the one, not in love with the idea of the wrong one.
We get caught up in loving the idea of a person, rather than the person themself. Love is completely selfless. It’s the act of two people coming together and fighting for each other through any and everything, rather than against each other. When you love someone, you would do absolutely anything for them because their happiness is your happiness. When you’re with the wrong one, the relationship to them is more revolved around their selfishness and needs.
4. The longer you stay, the harder it is to leave.
We like to stay with what we know. Very rarely do we go out looking for change because we get so used to our daily routine. However, the longer we stay with someone that isn’t right for us then the harder it is for us to end and leave the relationship. We want to feel wanted and loved. The longer we stay with somebody toxic to us, the more it’s actually destroying us in the end. If we cut the ties when we know it’s not right for us, it gives us a chance to find the right one that much sooner.
5. There is somebody out there for you.
The biggest lie we can believe is that there isn’t anybody else or that there isn’t anybody better. Everything happens for a reason, and relationships end when there is potentially something better for us. The problem is that we are impatient people. When something isn’t happening right away, we think that it’s never going to happen for us. What we don’t realize though, is that by being patient and waiting for the right one is worth it in the end. When we continue to drag ourselves down and stay with somebody we know could never be a “forever thing”, we are ruining not only our present, but also our future. Don’t sell yourself short. Toxic people can only destroy us if we let them. You’ll thank yourself in the end, when you’re with the right one.