Imagine you are sitting by a beach shore. There is a perfectly beautiful sunset in front of you. A beautiful painting of the sun and the clouds dancing together as the day ends. You’re there witnessing it all, and you feel at peace. You feel complete. You feel calm. You are aligned with yourself and that scene right in front of your eyes. You are home within yourself and the universe.
Isn’t that something we all crave a glimpse of? The feeling of being truly satisfied, truly peaceful with our humanness. The feeling of being at peace with our choices and how we lead our everyday lives and not just fooling ourselves that we do.
Every day is a day that culminates in us walking towards our truest selves or away from it. Every day is either choosing peace or having some dust accumulate on your chest. Every day, we feel a certain way. Every day we can sleep knowing that we stood by our beliefs, by the deepest desires of our hearts despite any obstacles and disappointments but still feel at peace knowing we were real and we tried. Or we can sleep knowing we’ve fooled ourselves, we’re walking in the wrong direction, we’re fighting the world and ourselves, and we sleep with this lingering pain.
You either make yourself a comfortable home to think and live in or you become an unbearable company for yourself. You make homes away from your soul, but no home fits you, and you keep hopping from one to the other, inner peace destroyed.
The shape of your heart starts changing. What was a potential home becomes a pile of blocks, and this becomes a pattern. You need to come home to yourself. You need to find your true home, and that answer is only within you no matter how far your travel or who you meet. Your shelter was always there all along, and it’s you. You need to look into it.
It might feel like a deserted island in the beginning with no clear features, but as you ask, a voice will whisper back to you, surely but slowly. After all, you need to build trust with that soul you’ve been neglecting. When the day comes, ask yourself the simple questions, the hard questions, the funny questions, and look, wait, and be patient. You need to be able to handle honesty. You need to accept what will be thrown at you. That’s the first step to building that beautiful home within yourself. Whatever the answers will be, please try to understand them. Try to nourish the desires that this voice will whisper to you. If you love dancing, dance. If you love drawing, draw. If you love books, read. If you love solving mathematical problems, solve them. Make that home warm, make it enjoyable, build it brick by brick.
When that voice whispers to you its pain and sorrows, its traumas and secrets, be kind. Don’t neglect them. Work on treating and healing them. Work on understanding them. If you continue to do so, soon this home will have a garden full of blooming sunflowers. If you continue to work on being close to yourself, accepting yourself, being a comfortable body and mind to live in, the sunflowers will multiply. Please don’t ever forget to listen to that voice and work with it gently so that most of your days can be as beautiful as watching the sun set with nothing but peace in your heart.