Feeling lost is extremely hard and frustrating. It’s feeling like you are wandering around aimlessly with no specific motivation or destination, and it is really exhausting. It sucks a lot of energy out of you because you truly want to figure yourself and your life out but can’t do that just yet. It’s wishing you were different, wishing you belonged, and waking up every day knowing what you live and stand for. It’s wishing life wasn’t confusing. It’s wishing that you could stick to something and follow it until your life slowly falls into place without being overwhelmed by all the different possible choices you can make. It’s wishing you knew so well what you wanted out life so that nothing can shake you, taking you back to square one.
You know that you will have to wake up and keep going because that is what life is about. It is about living it and making use of each breath you have. You know that you might keep feeling lost and there is no guarantee when it will end. You fear living your life without real contribution, meaning or fulfilment. You fear living the days just to get by and realizing one day that your life was something you didn’t make works of art out of. You wish something or someone could just come and guide you to where you perfectly fit and belong. You want to feel the drive, passion, and purpose that others around you feel. You want to be like those who seem to be so comfortable in their skin and contributions. You want to be passionate and good at something, but you first have to find it and it seems like a never ending process. Some people seem to have a clear vision of how they would like to live their lives, but you don’t.
Your mind and heart are scattered everywhere. One day you’re into something and the next you are not. Your feelings fluctuate and you are scared to give yourself to one thing in case you belong to another. Nothing fully clicks with you. Just thinking about it is exhausting, and the hardest part is trying to explain to others who you are and what you love because you are not even sure of your own identity. You find it hard to connect with people because you hate pretending like you know what you are doing when in reality you are utterly lost. You are in a vulnerable spot and your confidence is shaken because you are not on a solid ground.
And the thing is, you are always required to make daily choices that will always affect you in the long run. You fear making the wrong choices and not liking where you end up. You want to take responsibility for your life and how it will turn out.
Here is to us, the lost ones—may we keep going. May we always try new things and give ourselves infinite chances to find our way again, because feeling lost is something that happens a number of times across a lifetime. And here’s to the ones who have found themselves—thank you for giving the rest of us hope.