Sometimes you can’t help but fall in love with your best friend. The closeness and the relationship seem so surreal that you want more from it. And although fighting this feeling is some sort of a lost cause it might help to read some of this reasons why you should TRY to avoid it.
1. It’s Risking More Than You Want To Lose
I get the idea that having a girlfriend /boyfriend in a form of your best friend is the best thing that you could hope for because she/he gets you and makes things a lot easier. But your idea of it is utterly WRONG! Because it would be impossible even for you to assume the role of best friends while there are more feelings involve. Once the line is crossed it would be difficult to go back to the “best friend zone” thus risking the friendship for the uncertainty of going for more.
2. The Confidant You Once Have Will No Longer Be There
As I have clearly mentioned above, there is no mixing up the 2 roles so if you happen to went into an argument and wants someone to listen to you and vent all your frustrations, Sorry that someone was the one you just fought with and this is where the realization of the division you have crossed become evident. Gone is the person who is willing to smack you on the head if you’re being stupid but at same time will still sit with you and listen to all your shit.
3. Hanging Out and Small Talk Out In the Window. Kaput!
Your best friend is someone who you could talk to for hours without even having to consciously think of the words you have to say, you are so at ease that you could say just about anything and talk about whatever you feel like talking. You just hang out because being around each other already makes things light No Pressure No Expectation. This will never happen again if there is more between the two of you because now, you would have other concerns and small talk and easy things are no longer entertaining.
4. You Want More You Need To Give More
Since it is clear that you want an upgrade of the relationship, bear in mind that this change also comes with truckload of responsibility. You have to invest time not whenever you like it but EVERY TIME. Why? Because the normal hanging out, grabbing lunch activity no longer apply. There are more demands and meeting those demands means losing time for yourself which will eventually take a toll from you at the stretch of the relationship. Before this you can still excuse yourself, remember? Another thing, the PRIVILEGE you used to give your best friend for “Being There” is NOW an OBLIGATION to fulfill.
5. It Changes You Whether You Like It Or Not
Remember when you use to be objective and emphatic to your best friend? That you feel them and try to understand at which side they are coming from because you want to make things better if it’s not and even better if it is? Now it will be more difficult especially if you’re the one at the end of the stick and the issue might be coming from you. What else would change? Before you use to lay out all your cards and put everything out there because you are in the safety of the “Best Friend Zone”. This zone is your support, your anchor, your ally against whatever is out there. Now, you start to build a layer of protection, you hide things because you feel you’re vulnerable, you’re exposed and the ally that you have has the ability to HURT you now, badly.
When you are in love you are so blinded by the feeling and forget to think about the potential consequences of wanting more from the relationship you have. You think that everything will turn out good because at that very moment everything seems magical but reality bites and when it does, IT SUCKS! So a foreword before betting on your friendship might not be bad at all.
It is not wrong to fall in love with your best friend but you have to make sure it is for all the right reasons, you both feel the same way and the most important thing is that, you are both aware of the risk you’re entering to. Don’t just dive in because of the spur of the moment, discuss it together and think it through. You get to have a few best friends in a life time and sometimes you get to have only one and it would be nice to keep them forever and even stupendous, if they can also be the one to complete you.