1. He has a low self-esteem
We cannot love others unless we love ourselves. We all have our insecurities and increasing our self-esteem is a lifelong process. Nonetheless, if this guy shows clears signs of having a low self-esteem, run! And run fast unless you never want to be with someone who loves you back. I am not saying that a guy with a low self-esteem is incapable of being nice and that he won’t text you and call you almost too often, but beware, his attention might be a sign of his search for an unhealthy dependency and not a sign of love.
2. He lacks self-awareness
He doesn’t have to be Dalai Lama’s biggest fan, but if he is not at least somewhat self-aware, his growth as a person will be very slow. You should expect him to always redirect all blame to you when you guys have a conflict, and you should expect him to never try to improve where he falls short in his character. Nobody needs a f*** boy.
3. He has anger issues
Unless you are dead, you are capable of experiencing anger. We have all at least once lost our cool and embarrassed ourselves. However, if he has anger issues, he will consistently cope poorly with anger, and his anger will likely be disproportionate to the situation at hand. He might be handsome, charming, and treat you like the queen of the world when he is not angry, but his uncontrolled anger can lead to emotional and physical abuse. Do not sign yourself up to the potential of experiencing those consequences—the risk is too high.
4. He is not emotionally available
If he is married, stay away. Remember the golden rule and thus, respect yourself and the wife. Other than the fact that he is married, even if he is in the process of getting divorced or even if she is indeed a horrible person and he is stuck in the marriage for some reason, he won’t be fully available until he at least heals from some of the negativity of that past relationship. And if he recently got out of a relationship that meant something to him, even if he was not married, the same principle applies. It might not be his intention to make you his rebound and he might legitimately like you, but do not run the risk of becoming that, his rebound. Lastly, if he tells you that he is not emotionally available, believe him and stop dating him unless you don’t want dating him to evolve into a relationship.
5. He is not generous
Unless he is broke and/or with zero time in his hands, if he never donates a single dollar to a good cause (or does so begrudgingly), or if he never has any initiative to at least consider volunteering a bit of his time to a cause or to a friend in need, forget about him. Boundaries are important and he should be wise with his money and time but remember that a healthy amount of generosity is a sign of empathy and compassion. Nobody needs a second a**hole.