man and woman sitting in front of folding table in front of cafe with green awnings

Why God Allows You To Keep Attracting The Wrong Kind Of People

Maybe they’re actually the right people for you.

I bet you’re questioning why you always attract the wrong kind of people. Friends, family, coworkers, lovers. While that may be true, what if they’re actually the right people for you?

You see, the “wrong people” can also show you your worth as much as the “right people”, even if you don’t see it through the way they speak to you or the way they treat you.

They can be the people who are supposed to show you that you, in fact, deserve better.

When you put up with their inconsistency or their use of words or their short temper for too long, you get drained. You deteriorate, and your body tries to signal to you that this is not what you should accept.

Stop letting in anyone that comes your way: That’s the lesson they’re teaching you.

And God knew they were the right person to teach you that lesson. So, maybe they weren’t the wrong person for you.

The person who came into your life to show you what a good time is supposed to be? Thank them. But let them go when it’s no longer a good time. When it starts to become toxic and you start to forget why you even let them stay this long, you can let them go. There are no rules.

Trust yourself. Trust that you know yourself best—what makes you tingle with excitement and what absolutely wears you down.

So, let’s stop acting like life keeps sending us the wrong people.

We hold the key to our homes; we get to decide who stays and who leaves. And we get to learn how to be a better judge of this as life goes on. So, we must have patience. We must be willing to grow through the pain.

The patterns. The triggers. The familiarity. They’ll all clue you in.

Until then, the wrong people are all the right people in this season.

God knows your heart better than you do yourself. He knows the lessons you need. He’s not going to shield you from pain and evil, because He knows that’s not realistic. He allows these said “wrong” people to continue to meet you until you learn the lesson.

Parents who shield their children end up raising adults that need training wheels on their bikes, adults who don’t know how to stand up for themselves.

God wants you to thrive. He’s like a parent who wants you to be faced with wrong, because He’s fair, and because He trusts you. He wants to show you how powerful you are in realizing and being aware of what is right.

How can you know what is good unless you know bad?

How can you learn how to love unless you learn what is hatred?

How can we know what we deserve unless we are faced with what is unacceptable?

When a child touches the stove and gets burned, he now knows the pain he’ll choose to avoid next time the stove is on.

When you meet a stranger-turned-friend and you get hurt, you now know the pain you want to avoid next time you come across a stranger. Maybe you won’t let your guard down so easily this time. Maybe they’ll have to give you a trailer into the friendship they’d offer you before you commit to watching the whole thing unravel for itself. Or maybe you let them in and you have to call it quits later.

What I’m trying to say is, the wrong people are the right people for you until you make the decision to call them as they are.

You are learning. You are growing. Give yourself the space and forgiveness to accept what was in the past and to look forward with hope for the future.

In time, you will meet the right kind of people, the kind of right you knew existed, the kind of right you never have to mistake for wrong.

About the author
We watch movies knowing they end - but we stay for the story. Follow Amanda on Instagram or read more articles from Amanda on Thought Catalog.

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