10 Ways To Move On From Your Ex-Best Friend
1. Remove them from your social media.
Every time you come across their name on your newsfeed, your heart sinks low into the pit of your chest. All of the raw emotions return with a vengeance, and you feel a familiar nausea settle within your stomach. Keeping this person on your social media can and will only damage you. I recommend blocking in order to conceal the temptation of creeping. Whatever is going on in their lives should no longer concern or interest you.
2. Delete their phone number.
Drunk phone calls or texts will be your worst enemy. Save yourself the embarrassment (and your dignity) and just remove their number from your phone. You have no reason to contact them sober, and you’ll want to keep your drunk feelings separate from reality. In the ideal circumstance that they feel the desire to reconnect with you, they will. But in the meantime, cut the phone ties immediately.
3. Steer clear of passive aggressiveness.
The temptation is severe, especially in the beginning of the split-up. BUT RESIST! You will only make yourself look like the bad guy if everybody constantly sees you tweeting about that “sucky person who totally doesn’t deserve friendship EVER”. Yes, we know who you are talking about. And more than likely word will get back to them. Not good.
4. Vent when you need to, and then let it go.
Bottling in heavy emotions is never a good thing, so sharing your inner feelings with a small group of trusted people is healthy and natural. However, constantly ranting on and on about your ex-friend might end up making you feel worse instead of better. When the hurt feelings are fresh, talk and yell and scream and cry – get it out of your system! And then clean your slate, and leave this person behind you. Because talking bad about them will only hurt one person: you.
5. Make a positive list of reasons why you are better off.
Some people cope with heartbreak better when they are reminded of the good things that come out of a bad situation. By making a list of reasons why things can be better for you and your life in this new future can be the small boost you need to forward in your life and leave the toxic people behind for good.
6. Remember the true friends you still have in your life.
In times of loss and hurt, it is easy to forget the great things that we still have all around us. You may have lost a close friend, but keep in mind the people who still have your back, love you, and are ready to help get you back on your feet. One lost friendship does not mean you have lost everything. Always remember to count your blessings and appreciate what (or who) you still have in your life.
7. Keep your head held high.
A broken friendship is a great ego buster. But make a conscious effort to not let your confidence fade or fall short of your true potential. Just because one person is missing out on the great person you are doesn’t mean every person in your life will do the same. Tend to your bruised self-confidence, but make sure you get back on your feet twice as fast.
8. Never stoop down to their level.
Unfortunately, not all friendships end nicely. In fact, most never do. Sometimes people resort to spitefulness or revenge in order to hurt you and get you to react back. These people might spread rumors, try to get people to “take their side” and dislike you, and do everything in their power to keep you angry and hurt. If you feed into these people, you will always lose. Their goal is to hurt you and make you look bad, and the minute you retaliate they win. So what do you do? Nothing! Yeah, it is definitely easier said than done, but it will only benefit you positively in the long run. Not only will you be the better, more mature person but you will also show people the real you (and not those icky rumors) – actions speak louder than words!
9. Be kind.
If you live in a small town or go to the same school or maybe even have the same group of friends, chances are you may end up running into this person. Try to resist the urge to glare at them from across the room or inform nearby people what a terrible person he or she is. Now, you don’t have to run over and give them a big ol’ hug as if nothing ever happened; you should be true to yourself and your feelings, and you are probably not okay with what happened. But if they say hello, say hi back. Be polite. Be kind. It doesn’t mean that you are fake and insincere. Being polite is simply a choice of decency. You are both human, you deserve to be acknowledged as such.
10. Forgive them.
Wait! Don’t roll your eyes at me just yet. I know this is another “easier said than done” tip, and it is nothing close to easy. But when it comes to truly moving forward from a broken friendship (or a broken anything, really) forgiveness is key. Forgiveness does not mean that they are off the hook for what they have done. It does not mean that hurting you was okay. It simply means that you have acknowledged the wrong that has been done to you, and you are choosing to move past it and no longer linger on it. If you can forgive your ex-best friend, you can officially say you have moved on from them. Whether forgiving them means you reconnect or permanently leave them in your past, the result is the same – peace for you at last.