This Is What You’ll Really Learn In College

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College: Four years of complete and utter craziness.
The best and worst times you’ll ever have.

You’ll cry tears of joy and pain. You’ll laugh so hard your stomach hurts and you’ll probably throw up so much your stomach hurts also. You learn many lessons in college and throughout life. You’ll have shitty professors and amazing ones as well. You’ll procrastinate and regret it later when you’re up all night finishing a paper. You’ll crash and burn. You’ll shine and glisten.

You’ll find your dream job or your nightmare. You’ll lose friends only to end up with ones that will last forever. You’ll find the love of your life right away or it might take a few really bad heartbreaks.

You’ll watch some weird movies that you’ll love at 3am. You’ll learn that going to bed before midnight is a luxury and you should be so lucky. You’ll realize that sleep is a four letter word. You’ll eat some very questionable things in the cafeteria but be assured it was made with care. You’ll have mental and emotional breakdowns, you’ll come out stronger than ever.

The day you get a care package from home containing food will be a holiday. Breaks from school will be used for naps and only naps. You will walk around literally hating people. You’ll realize the only way to make good money after college or during is illegal.

You’ll learn to value privacy as you don’t get it living in a residence hall. You’ll realize the joy of not having to wear pants all day and the fun of going to class in your PJ’s. You’ll realize that somedays you have to cry alone. Any day you find a dollar you feel rich because you’re so broke it’s not even funny.

You’ll have at least one friend with a car or be the friend with the car. You’ll notice the library typically smells like blood, sweat and tears. You’ll find Netflix to be very good company on a lonely Saturday night. You’ll realize that group projects SUCK and that sometimes you may end up doing all the work. You’ll probably change your major at least once or twice or you’ll add or drop a minor.

When you go to register for classes you generally won’t care what you take as long as it is not at 8 am. If you have an 8 am class, you’ll walk around wanting to kill people.

You’ll learn that eventually giving a crap is something you can fake. You’ll learn that your bed is the most comfortable sanctuary on earth, you’ll learn to live with a dorm that doesn’t turn the heat off until finals week of spring semester. You’ll smell things that can’t be forgotten and see things that can’t be unseen. You’ll learn things you already know. And you’ll probably order pizza and pay the delivery guy in all pennies.

So enjoy the time you have in college the good, bad and terrible; because despite all that college is an amazing time and you’ll look back on it down the road and miss it.

Even if you said that you wouldn’t miss a damn thing about it.