1. Waking up and running into your roommate’s new boyfriend while she’s in the shower.
First thought: “Am I supposed to talk to him?” Second thought: “I really need my own place.”
2. Getting caught in the stairwell with a neighbor you’ve never seen before.
You feel like you should ask them when they moved in, but you don’t care, so you just let them walk down the stairs behind you in complete silence.
3. Dealing with someone trying to make small talk on a crowded subway.
Personally, I always just pretend I can’t speak English. It’s just better that way.
4. Having your name called out at Starbucks when your coffee is ready.
Yeah, I’m right here. No need to draw attention to me, dammit!
5. Then not being the only person in Starbucks with that first name getting a venti Americano.
Can we say awkward much?
6. Office meetings. All of them, especially the ones held at a round table.
At least it’s a good time to get caught up on Candy Crush as you stare at your phone feigning note taking.
7. Washing our hands next to someone in the bathroom.
Sinks really should have about six feet between them, at least.
8. Not to mention peeing in a bathroom full of people not peeing, but just standing around chatting.
This one really needs to be outlawed. Besides, isn’t that what a water cooler is for?
9. Waiting patiently for lunch.
It’s, like, what am I supposed to do with my hands and arms, as I stand here waiting for my turkey wrap?
10. Then having to share one of those community tables in the lunchroom in the office.
You live to eat alone, so this is just hell on earth. And why is everyone chewing so loudly?
11. Talking on the phone with a client who refuses to email.
Yes, I get that it’s easier than using your fingers sometimes, but it’s not easier on our nerves.
12. Happy hour drinks with the office.
You don’t like them, you don’t want to, and there has to be a Law & Order episode on somewhere in the world, so why am I even here?
13. Sharing a cab back downtown with a co-worker you barely know.
So, how about those Yankees? Oh, wait. The season is over?
14. Having to call in your dinner delivery, because your favorite place isn’t on Seamless.
Apparently, you need to find a new “favorite” place, because this communicating on the phone this is getting real old.
15. Sitting on the couch with your roommate’s boyfriend in silence as you anxiously wait for her to get home.
You’d go to bed, but this is your TV and you finally get to watch some Law & Order. You really need to get your own place. Stat.
16. Saying goodnight to them as they start to make out in front of you …
No, why?!? That’s bedroom-only stuff! God, I really hope tomorrow is less stressful. My brain just can’t take anymore of this.