You Don’t Have To Be Compatible To Be In Love

man and woman kissing
Matias Saw / Unsplash

We were more than friends, but we weren’t more than that.

We’ve all been there.

I think when a relationship starts to feel one sided, you start to feel what’s coming next. It inevitably does not work out. It can feel overwhelmingly dejecting while also hurting our self-esteem. It can impact how we view ourselves and how we think others perceive us.

For you, it may be utterly clear what the other person did wrong. Whatever the intention, they made you feel as if they didn’t care. They made you feel like you weren’t important. They made you feel like they didn’t love you back.

Perhaps at times they did. But at other times, they didn’t.

That’s not meant to be an easy thing. It’s not.

There are a number of ways to deal with a situation at this point and most of us (myself included) can be guilty or not knowing when to let go. We want to hold on because we’re afraid of the unknown. So we hold onto what’s familiar and what makes sense right here and now.

It’s easy to get wrapped up in the cycle of temporary happiness at the cost of pain, rejection, or uncertainty.

But, you don’t need to convince someone to love you. You should not have to convince someone to love you. On a rational level, we all know that.

So, know that you can let go. Even if you feel as though you’re nowhere near capable of being able to, I’m here to tell you that you can.

Even if it feels impossible. Still, you can let go.

Forget about rationalizing behavior and hoping for the best. Those feelings of uncertainty take up time and space that could be used and expressed elsewhere.

You are enough for someone: Someone else.

So, you aren’t compatible. You aren’t meant to grow in the same direction.

It doesn’t lessen the chemistry and excitement you once felt.

Be grateful for each moment of happiness and allow it to be a part of your story.

But there’s plenty more of your story to be explored. Go find it. TC mark

Alyssa Lynn

Buy my book "Put The Damn Phone Down" available now on Amazon.

Do you long for more meaningful connections with the people in your life?

What if we simply put our phones down and connected again as humans?

In Put the Damn Phone, Alyssa Malmquist tackles where we’re at in 2018 with technology, communication, self-image, sexism, social media, and the increasingly rapid change we’ve experienced alongside growing technology.

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