We were always told that we won’t be capable to love others if we do not learn to love ourselves first. But when you think about it, we are often taught how to love others, bend over backwards for people who wouldn’t do the same for us, and go beyond the capability of delivering love and effort for other people but not for ourselves.
We are often made to believe that it’s okay to accept the kind of love we think we deserve and never beyond that. That it’s okay to leave ourselves out from the love we so freely give away. The love that we willingly give only to have nothing left for ourselves.
We often think doing so is right until it warps our mind to thinking that self worth is not learning to love ourselves first, but learning to love other people so we could be capable of loving ourselves.
So that we may think doing more for people makes us a better person. That putting others before ourselves justifies our self worth for the amount of love and effort we put out. And while there are more factors that leads us to false sense of self love, I think it’s about time we change that and make it as what it should really be.
Loving yourself shouldn’t be because of anyone else and definitely shouldn’t be because you want to be able to love someone else better. We should be accepting of our flaws because the reality is that at the end of the day, the only person you truly have is yourself.
We can’t always keep thinking someone is going to be there for us at 4 am when you’re feeling the weight of the world and in need of someone to talk it out with just like you would if someone else was in your shoes. And for that we have to be stronger for ourselves.
We need to learn to pick ourselves up off the floor and continue to be a functional human being. Our body is our home, we can’t live in it peacefully if we mentally keep on destroying it.
Our self worth shouldn’t be solely based on how much satisfaction we get by overexerting effort and love.
Why can’t we learn to do that to ourselves? Why can’t we love ourselves just the same?
We should be encouraging ourselves, no matter how hard it is to be genuinely content about our well-being, that little efforts still contributes to building ourselves up for the kind of love we truly deserve. We should not lessen our standards of love. We should be expecting to be loved the way we want to be and truly deserved to be loved and not just accepting of what we think is enough and most of all, give love and still keep a little (a lot) for yourself.
You are worth more than you think you do and you should never have to feel guilty of never delivering or catering enough to other peoples need. You are what’s important and you are what you need to focus on –not other people.