Alarm goes off and it’s time to go to work. Hit snooze a few more times before getting out of bed. Spread out across the sheets and wrap yourself in blankets because the bed is all yours.*
*Bonus points if you use more than one pillow and prop yourself up like a queen.
Start getting ready for work. Pick out something that feels business casual but also sexy, so you can catch eyes with that guy from the cubicle next to yours. Realize you need black leather pumps to complete the outfit. Rock flats anyway because ain’t nobody got time for that.*
*Pro-tip: throw the heels in your bag and take them to go. Then change into them when you’re at the office.
Squeeze onto the subway and avoid eye contact at all costs. Pray no one tries to talk to you. Spot a hot guy across the aisle and then hope he talks to you. Think about how exciting it will be to tell your children you met on the subway. Pause when you hear it’s your stop and someone knocks you over to get out the door.
Stop at Starbucks because you’d rather have coffee and be a few minutes late than have no coffee at all. Notice a couple at a table sharing scones and enjoying life. Wonder how these people have time to sit down and eat breakfast. Grab a scone to go because they look delicious.
Arrive at the office. Plug in headphones and listen to something upbeat. Hear that pop song from that dive bar and think of that guy you met over the weekend. Draft a text to send him and then erase it because it’s all song lyrics. Make a mental note to save the song so you can listen to it again later.
Run out for lunch because you forgot the sandwich you made at home and were never planning to eat it anyway. Decide on a spot near the office and stand in a line of twenty-something men in suits. Contemplate if any of them have original thoughts. Check out the guy in front of you who looks like someone you might have matched with on Tinder.
Check your phone to see if that guy from this weekend texted you. He didn’t. Think about how mysterious subway man or attractive lunch line bro would have texted back. G-chat your best friend to discuss possible explanations and come to the following conclusions:
1. He lost his phone
2. He’s busy living his life and hasn’t thought to reach out
3. He’s just not that into you*
*Immediately rule out option 3 because that’s impossible.
You’re free! Meet your friends for happy hour. Be the first one at the bar and sit alone while you wait. Pretend to check your phone and debate chatting up the older guy next to you. See he has a wedding ring and decide against it. Text your friend to hurry up.
Get home and make a late dinner. Relax on the couch and scroll through the channels until you find something good to watch. Settle on a romcom you’ve seen a million times. Half-watch it as you swipe through all the dating apps. Lose interest when you land on a guy with two first names and zero morals.
Start to get ready for bed. Read a book your friend suggested and try not to look at your phone. Set an alarm for 7:30 AM. Get a text from that guy from this weekend, “Plans tomorrow?” Wait a few minutes to respond. Tell him you’re free. Smile because you can sleep easy now. Tomorrow’s a new day.