10 Reasons Colorado Girls Are WAY Better Than California Girls

Shutterstock / Linda Moon
Shutterstock / Linda Moon

I saw this article titled, 10 Irresistible Qualities That Define A California Girl, the other day. Okay, to each his own and all that, but come on, outdoorsy? Sporty? Cultured? Beautiful? If you want a girl who truly personifies all those qualities, you won’t find her in the land of liposuction, Botox, and fake tits. I mean, unless you’re into that kind of thing. If you want a natural beauty, with real boobs and a real thirst for the outdoors, you won’t find her anywhere other than colorful Colorado. Because this is what makes a true Colorado woman:

1. She’s NATURALLY beautiful.

Oh, California girls are gorgeous alright. But anyone would be gorgeous with fake boobs, a nose job, a personal trainer, and endless hours to spend at the tanning salon (yes, I’m stereotyping, bite me). If you want a girl who’s beautiful without all the extra fluff, go to Colorado. Colorado ladies might not be as tan, but at least they look natural. They might not have fake boobs, but they have real smiles, real hair, and real bodies, which is what real men desire, anyway. A Colorado girl doesn’t need gobs of makeup to give her a beautiful face, and she doesn’t need to wear a bikini or booty shorts to get attention. Her gorgeous personality and flannel shirt is just enough to make any man fall in love.

2. She’s not just fun, she a BLAST.

She has marijuana. I mean, come on. (I don’t smoke, but I know the idea of having legal weed in Colorado is enticing, so I’m using it to strengthen my argument.) Anyone who has ever been high, especially in an already high (altitude wise) state, knows how much fun it can be. Add a gorgeous Colorado girl into the mix, and you’re in for the time of your life. But really, a Colorado girl knows how to have fun, weed or no weed. She isn’t afraid to try new things, because even after living there for her entire life, there are still places she hasn’t been and things she hasn’t done. It’s like an amusement park of adventure right in her backyard. How could a Colorado girl not be a blast?

3. She’s REALLY outdoorsy.

California girls can claim to be outdoorsy because they leave their beachside condo to take a stroll down the boardwalk to shop at their favorite local vendors, or because she lays in the sun for five hours a day, but we all know that doesn’t actually count as being outdoorsy.

A Colorado girl will spend her weekends scaling 14,000 foot mountains, four wheeling through mud, trout fishing in the stream, hunting and gutting a deer, and cutting her fingers and knees open trying to climb a sick 5.10 she discovered in her newest rock climbing guidebook. I guarantee California girls don’t even know what a 5.10 is. Being outdoorsy is more than just playing in a bikini at the beach, sorry Cali, you’re going to have to try harder on that one.

4. She’s not THAT open minded, because she doesn’t want her brains to fall out.

Okay, so Colorado is an extremely eclectic place. Boulder is the city of hippies and weed lovers, Pueblo is full of Mexicans, Denver is half for the partiers and half for the serious business folk, and Colorado Springs is the perfect mix of it all. But one thing unites all Colorado girls — they know what they believe, and they aren’t letting anyone tell them otherwise.

A California girl might let anything fly, but a Colorado girl has standards and knows that being too open minded is never a good thing. After all, if you don’t stand for something, you’ll fall for anything. This doesn’t make her a stiff or a boring mate, though. Don’t worry, since a Colorado girl knows exactly what she wants, she won’t be afraid to take the initiative with confidence, something men find extremely attractive.

5. She’s friendly AND keeps her friends.

While California girls might flash you a pretty smile and then continue on their way down to the beach, a Colorado girl will not only smile, but ask you to join her for her morning hike or grab a beer at her favorite local brewery. Colorado is famous for those. A Colorado girl makes friends easily, and then she keeps them. She is loyal and knows that deeply connecting with people is more important than just waving as she passes by. She isn’t a fake friend, and she won’t talk crap about you behind your back. Colorado girls are too chill for LA TV drama. Like, keep that stuff in California, please.

6. She’s ORIGINAL.

California girls think they are creative because they just came up with the best new lip gloss flavor or they just landed a role in a 10-second commercial. Sorry, but real creativity can better be found in Colorado.

A Colorado girl surrounds herself with nature. She immerses her body and mind into everything she does, whether that’s mountain top yoga, cycling through the Garden of the Gods, painting a portrait of the Rockies, crafting a new beer in her living room, or whatever else she can think of. In Colorado, the sky is the limit, and Colorado girls can pretty much touch the sky when standing on top of Pikes Peak.

A Colorado girl is unique and original. Her outfits aren’t Chanel, Gucci, or Prada, and she doesn’t care if her bra matches her panties. She’s 100% creatively and perfectly imperfect.

7. She’s part of the FITTEST state in the nation.

Colorado is number one when it comes to the percentage of fit/active/healthy adults in the United States. Sure, swimming and jogging are good ways to stay active, but California is nothing compared to Colorado. A Colorado girl can hike, mountain bike, rock climb, altitude train, swim, snowboard, trail run, zipline, skydive, and do just about any activity (besides surfing, but even then, we have water skiing and wakeboarding, so it’s basically the same) to stay fit and active. A Colorado girl is also very health-conscious in general. She eats nutritious foods and pays close attention to her body in order to stay in the best shape possible.

In a state with over 56 mountains, a super high altitude, and a bunch of other fit enthusiasts, it’s basically impossible to be unhealthy.

8. She’s NOT a dumb blonde or a party junky.

California is notorious, at least in every state but California, for being a state full of party happy beach bums.

“Like, oh my god, Stacy, I can’t decide if I should put my mascara on before or after I go swimming.”

Blonde hair, bouncy boobs, booty shorts, and low IQs are the stereotype of the California girl. Sorry, but most stereotypes exist for a reason, just saying.

Colorado girls, even the blonde ones, are extremely intelligent. A Colorado girl takes the time to study, not just in school, but out in her native surroundings. She isn’t just book smart, but she can also navigate her way through the woods, build a fire with sticks, and cook a meal without a recipe. Just because Cali has some of the best schools, doesn’t mean the people attending them are actually studying. And while the California girl parties it up, the Colorado girl learns how to bait a hook, sculpt a clay vase, and do advanced biochemical equations, all in a day’s work.

9. She’s got class AND culture.

California girls might interact with people of all races and religions, but do they know how to do it properly?

A Colorado girl is raised to have class. She might hold strongly to her beliefs, but that doesn’t mean she is going to criticize others for them. She isn’t prejudiced in any way—one of the reasons Colorado is such a diverse and accepting place to live. Colorado isn’t segregated into the “fancy” districts and the “slums.” We don’t have ghetto cities versus wealthy cities. We all just kind of mesh together. Sure, different places are known for different things, but even there you will find all kinds of variety. Colorado girls are used to interacting with all different people on a daily basis, so they know how to handle each and every person with class and respect, rather than looking down on someone because they aren’t as tan or as rich.

10. She still lives in COLORADO, not California.

A Colorado girl has been to California multiple times, and she knows she’s not missing much. She prefers her hammock in the trees to a towel on the beach. She would rather talk about philosophy and craft beer than plastic surgery and Hollywood. She isn’t obsessed with the latest underwear models, and she doesn’t care if there’s not a Seven Jeans store for at least a thousand miles.

A Colorado girl relishes her mountains as if they were her own creation, and she knows that everyone who comes to her state wishes they never had to leave. Because after all, Colorado is the greatest.

Okay, as you can tell, it’s pretty obvious that Colorado chicks are way cooler than California girls. But really, all women are beautiful creatures, and every state has its own unique qualities that make it wonderful. I know I did a lot of stereotyping here, but most of it was to make a point. We often group one category of people as “the best.” We think Cali girls are better. We think skinny is better. We think rich is better. Whatever it is, we are constantly blocking people together in groups, and then claiming that everyone from that group is somehow better than anyone else.

Truth is, not all Colorado girls are fit. Not all of them are genuine or classy. Not all of them are smart or outdoorsy or fun. But my prejudices want me to see it this way, so I clump us all together and then classify us as one big awesome group of chicks. Well, we are all awesome, but we aren’t all checklist chicks. We don’t all match up to this list, and that’s okay. Because California girls are unforgettable. But so are Colorado girls, Michigan girls, Alaska girls, New Jersey girls, and Mississippi girls. ALL girls are amazing in their own ways. So take this article for what it is: a fun and slightly over-stereotyped piece of jabber for your reading pleasure, and go out and love yourself, no matter what state you’re from. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Single mother. Photographer. Writer. Adventurer. Lover of life.

Keep up with Allyson on allysonbcallahan.wordpress.com

More From Thought Catalog